venting

I want t hurt myself. I am tried of feeling hopeless, scared. I do not know what to do! 
My counselor told my disability counselor I was smoking pot, now I have a meeting with them because they a place where they help dumb asses get a job. 
i do know what to do! I can not find a job alone. What am I going to do!
I can control my temper, my anxiety is getting the best of me and my depression just got elevated by all this.
I WANT TO HURT MYSELF SO BAD! MAYBE I SHOULD JUST END IT. WHAT IS THE POINT!