Last night Mike sent me a gchat message saying that he has been looking at one of my freshmen rowers and wants to try him out on varsity. It is known that I strongly feel that every freshmen rower needs to experience their entire freshmen year on the freshmen team. It is there where they build the foundation to become great rowers. That is crucial for a novice rower. So Mike asked me for my opinion and I told him how I felt. I told him that I do not believe it is the best decision for that rower, nor do I believe that it will affect ther est of the novices in a good way. I also listened to his thoughts. I told him that I would sleep on what he sai and talk to him today. So I did. My thoughts didn't change. I created a pros and cons list- nothing changed. I can not begin to explain how strognly I feel about this.
Today we spoke on the phone and we talked everything over. Essentially i feel as though I am just being walked over. He asked for my opinion, but in the end said he was going to talk to the kid on monday anyways. Technicaly it didn't matter whether he asked for my opinion or not.
I have been a mess since last night. I warned mike that I may not be able to stay on the team if something i feel so strongly about is ignored. He laughed. I wasn't joking. I spoke to the president of the board and explained the situation. I told him the same thing. He just said that he is the head coach so he has the overal say. I'm sorry but a varsity coach should not be able to just pluck whomeever he wants to be on his team. He can not just take a rower from another coache's squad and move him up. A freshmen should be on the freshmen team unless they have prior rowing experience.
There were many other comments that he said that really hurt and obthered me. Such as, "I'd like to come to an agreement as well, but to be frank i am the head coach and this is whats best for the team."
In order for me to be an effective coach and role model for langly crew i need to be able to believe in the head coach and support his decisions 100%.
Bottomline I am going to resign. In order for me to be an effective coach and role model for langly crew i need to be able to believe in the head coach and support his decisions 100%. And I can not do that right now. I have let many things slide before, but I do not believe i can continue to do this.
I am terrified that it might be the wrong decision or that I am being a wuss...argh.
Today we spoke on the phone and we talked everything over. Essentially i feel as though I am just being walked over. He asked for my opinion, but in the end said he was going to talk to the kid on monday anyways. Technicaly it didn't matter whether he asked for my opinion or not.
I have been a mess since last night. I warned mike that I may not be able to stay on the team if something i feel so strongly about is ignored. He laughed. I wasn't joking. I spoke to the president of the board and explained the situation. I told him the same thing. He just said that he is the head coach so he has the overal say. I'm sorry but a varsity coach should not be able to just pluck whomeever he wants to be on his team. He can not just take a rower from another coache's squad and move him up. A freshmen should be on the freshmen team unless they have prior rowing experience.
There were many other comments that he said that really hurt and obthered me. Such as, "I'd like to come to an agreement as well, but to be frank i am the head coach and this is whats best for the team."
In order for me to be an effective coach and role model for langly crew i need to be able to believe in the head coach and support his decisions 100%.
Bottomline I am going to resign. In order for me to be an effective coach and role model for langly crew i need to be able to believe in the head coach and support his decisions 100%. And I can not do that right now. I have let many things slide before, but I do not believe i can continue to do this.
I am terrified that it might be the wrong decision or that I am being a wuss...argh.
Replies
I know you and mike have a touchy history. I don\'t really know the rules of the \'game\' but you could see this two ways:
He asked you for you opinion which is nice but he is the head coach so it\'s really his decision.
Or he just rubbed it in nastily that he does whatever he wants anyway, no matter what you think.
If you feel this strong about the whole affair I thing you should resign. I leave my group because I feel very strongly that it is wrong for the therapist to suddenly not accept insurance anymore, not because I couldn\'t afford it. It\'s a principle and I would feel resentment every time I went. So I\'d rather miss out than compromise my values. And if that\'s how you feel you are doing the right thing. You are definitely not a wuss, no matter what you decide.
steph, i am glad you spoke your mind and held firm to your beliefs, even though technically it is the head coaches decsion in the end. there was no reason to make nasty comments, he asked you your opinion and stated it, why he did who knows? when i believe strongly in something i belong to or thoughts and i feel i am right, i would not stay. sadly, as you love doing this i feel it is the right decsion to resign.