friday
Why is it when I am trying to get up the nerve to talk to HIM about our problems that I am suddenly blank and don't know what to say? This weekend we do not have the kids and no real plans..I'm hoping to get him to talk. We can't keep living as roommates. I feel like we are so far apart we don't even seem to have anything in common anymore...unless it's household stuff or going to the gym, etc. I have to find that fine line between when he's done working for the day but before the beers start to pile up. Remi is somewhat better although her nose still feels warm and she keeps putting her head in my lap and looking at me like..hey mom, fix this? She was hungry though and although not her usual self she did roll in the grass a little in the sun. I know, I am obsessing over my dog..but she's like my kid...my best friend. And taking care of a sick animal doesn't freak me out like it would taking care of a person where I would no doubt become sick myself.
How do I figure out the right things to say if I don't even know how to help myself?
How do I figure out the right things to say if I don't even know how to help myself?
Replies
Remi IS your fur-baby and depends on your good care. There is a strong bond of love and trust there. That is really good she is eating and rolling in the grass. Our pets are very much our children and we love them very much.
You have a really good sense about what you need to do to have a good life. It is that we need to learn to \'trust\' that sense and go with it. With practice we can and will get better at doing this.
It seems the two of you behave as so many married couples. In my marriage we went through \'phases\' and looking back on it everything turned out well. It seems the two of you are becoming \'settled\' in your relationship. Have \'date nights\' and work at putting the \'spark\' back into the relationship. Add that \'special\' touch - candlelight dinners, etc. Also, have some serious heart to heart talks and get to know each other while setting some mutual goals to work on.
Take very good care.
:-) Patricia
Dear Freak, lol
Here is a trick that I have used several times myself when having to confront a problem with a person that that I have trouble speaking with.
Get a pad of paper and just write down a rough draft of the major points. Just something that will remind you of them and what you need to say. It can be just one word, like \"work- to much\". That made me think about what I had to say and to aviod the confusion of to many emotions going on at the same time. You can refine your list as many times as you want to and then when the time is right, you can refer back to it in case you think you missed something that needed to be discussed. Hope this helps, Eric