Women who Love too Much Community Group
WHEN BEING IN LOVE, MEANS BEING IN PAIN... This group is to help women through the journey of realizing they can love themselves. To help realize that they are capable of having a happy, healthy, whole relationship and break the cycle of abuse and heartache from loving emotionally unavailable men.
why do I do it?! I make myself so unhappy!
So much self-doubt and fear.
My H has been a bit 'off' and says he was tired. Its so ok to be like that but it makes me feel so scared…and I know its so unfair of me to feel like that.
He had refused to say he loved me. ( because I asked him why he hadn't before we went to sleep, he always does. )
I need it so much., too much, I just can't go to sleep until I feel ok and can relax. He always says it. But this night he said " I'm sick of your neediness and insecurities…Im not saying anything unless I feel I want to."
so I lay awake all night, fear gripping my heart….feeling sick, sweaty. I don't know why I do this to myself. He has such power. I tried to go to sleep saying to myself, 'but I love you sunny. '
I was in agony.
I can't understand how he can know how I feel about this as we have talked about it, he knows saying what he did would hurt me and keep me needing him….why wouldn't you just say the words to give me some peace.?
I have been reading about General Anxiety Disorder….anyone have any history with this.?
I went to my Doctors the other day to discuss a referral for therapy but I was so scared I couldn't move and just sat in the car park.
Its pathetic I know….and I really want to overcome all this.
I m getting worse.
So much self-doubt and fear.
My H has been a bit 'off' and says he was tired. Its so ok to be like that but it makes me feel so scared…and I know its so unfair of me to feel like that.
He had refused to say he loved me. ( because I asked him why he hadn't before we went to sleep, he always does. )
I need it so much., too much, I just can't go to sleep until I feel ok and can relax. He always says it. But this night he said " I'm sick of your neediness and insecurities…Im not saying anything unless I feel I want to."
so I lay awake all night, fear gripping my heart….feeling sick, sweaty. I don't know why I do this to myself. He has such power. I tried to go to sleep saying to myself, 'but I love you sunny. '
I was in agony.
I can't understand how he can know how I feel about this as we have talked about it, he knows saying what he did would hurt me and keep me needing him….why wouldn't you just say the words to give me some peace.?
I have been reading about General Anxiety Disorder….anyone have any history with this.?
I went to my Doctors the other day to discuss a referral for therapy but I was so scared I couldn't move and just sat in the car park.
Its pathetic I know….and I really want to overcome all this.
I m getting worse.
I used to volunteer in a hospice but I can't be a reliable volunteer anymore with working like I do.
Hmmm Im liking the art classes thing - one of my dreams was to have my own art academy for special needs children - its finding the right location and space to use. Moving house later this year so will consider this when we choose next house!
What would make the most difference to my life would be to have my own car, and to have a studio space and privacy. Im still trying to overcome the guilt about painting!!!
and when you move you can move your group or use your car to get there!!
if you have the slightest big of passion for something....take baby steps to go for it...maybe envision what it would look like??? how many kids?? what kind of kids? ages?? with parents or without??
maybe you could sell the art to purchase supplies and donate???? go nuts in your imagination if you have passion for the idea and let it be fun for you....dream a little!!!!
that's wonderful!! we have art centers here in my town that use teachers. so the art center supplies everything and the teacher shows up and gets' paid..... do you have anything like that??
a plasticine class for women could be so much fun!!!!
sunny maybe there is a way to do one small thing a week......1.5 hours??
my sister in law's mother has a group of women who use a room in a library to paint every friday for a couple hours. she mentors them....amazing art is coming out of that group. they have painted hats, watercolor cards, "rugs" or matts for the kitchen floor, big canvas...
it would be a great way to show compassion and tenderness for yourself. a great way to carve out time an space for yourself in your life.............
Its really lovely and not too big…..
…it has toilets and a kitchen…and a car park and play ground….
perfect for my art group…….
….ooo can I feel excitement…..!!!????
I still have a lot of social anxiety though but its good to plan.
I really need that car….!
x
making space for yourself in your life and in your relationship is wonderful!!! and putting attention on your girls is wonderful for them as well!!! good for you sunny!!!!
can't wait to hear about it!!
She posts the most inspiring newsletter posts. SHe is very open and honest.
http://www.qemamumosaics.com/about-me/4571589420
i'm excited for you sunny!! she does beautiful work but i can't wait to see yours!
im hoping my girls will like it too, both my daughters are creative but they haven't found their 'thing' yet and the eldest has some OCD so Im thinking putting all those little tiles on really carefully will suit her!!!
lol!
I have some / quite a lot of social anxiety issues too and tend to bottle it, when it comes to things like this, but with my girls coming Im sure I won't.
the old feeling of wanting to just hide away in a cave….
I saw a quote from somewhere -
the darkness is only there until you turn to the light.
just coloured my hair burgundy RED!!!
made an appointment with a new doctor.
and moved my damn easel to a quiet place!
xxx