Wives of Alcoholics Community Group
A forum of healing and help for wives of alcoholics.
notmyselfwhenhere
I try so hard to think of his alcoholism as a disease. But tonight...tonight I feel like the drinking was a decision - a choice he made. His sister died last week and I know he feels he "deserves the right" to de-stress and relax. I know it. so many other times when he "slips", it's been depression and he hasn't wanted to get out of bed. Today, he got out of bed, ran some errands and then chose to drink. He is starting a new job in just over a week so didn't work today and doesn't need to work for 10 more days.
It's very hard to not plan for divorce or separation when I feel he's making a choice and it's not "just the disease". He's passed out upstairs while I sleep on the couch.
It's very hard to not plan for divorce or separation when I feel he's making a choice and it's not "just the disease". He's passed out upstairs while I sleep on the couch.
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We are here all the time to support our husbands and when they constantly tell you that they WILL NOT DRINK ANY MORE, you try to believe them.
I have been by husbands side for months and months while he tries to remain sober but constantly he "falls of the Wagon".
He was seeking help from "Smart Recovery yesterday and before he went to the appointment he had a bottle of wine.
Only 2 days ago, he begged me to not abandon him!
He's going to AA and I drive him to the meetings (his lost his driving license) hoping that he will finally find a way stop drinking.
He's a kind loving man normally and when he drinks he's still a kind a nice man but drunk and not the husband I married.
Yes, I do think it's disease but I also think there is an element of choice. We do not have alcohol in the house so mu husband MAKES THE CHOICE TO GO TO THE LOCAL SHOP AND BUY ALCOHOL!!
I hope you find some peace today. It's such a horrible place for us wives to be in. To love and understand a Alcoholic husband puts an enormous, stress and pressure on us.
Take Care.
Once he is sober, he made a conscious decision to go to a store, buy a bottle, and drink it.
It is possible that he has underlying mental issues such as depression and he is drinking to self medicate -- he should see a professional if this is the case.
But once he quit drinking, it was his choice to drink again.