Years ago, I was a member of several groups on dailystrength, most of which were so helpful and life saving to me at that time. I recently joined a couple new groups based on where I am in my life now. I have to say, I'm really not impressed. No harm, no foul, but I really feel the need to post this and point out that when someone is seeking out support, the first responses should probably not be to be blown off or have their feelings invalidated. Yes, we all need to hear some hard truths at times, but my recent experiences have pretty much made me want to leave this site in its entirety. 

I appreciate the one (in this group) and one or two in others who did attempt to understand more of my situation and where I am coming from, otherwise, I'm honestly concerned about the concept of "support". The longest response I have had to my initial posts included:  "You have to join..." and redirecting to a post that so much is probably going "to even worry about something as traival as that" and "it's more about him and his recovery...." and "what does that say about you, you were an enabler" and pretty much that I should just chill and be patient. 

Really? I came here looking for support for what I'm feeling and experiencing. I was honest about my own past issues and triggers, as well as being cognizant of them. I included that I expect this to be a process and that intellectually, I understand it and that it may seem feel silly to feel how I feel, but that it is where I am. I did not expect to be told what I should do or how I should feel and especially, not be told that if I really loved my partner, I would chill out. That's not supportive, I'm sorry to say.

I wish everyone here the best with their experience, but this is not my view of support. It should be okay for us to experience whatever we are experiencing as an individual, to vent and bitch and have a little pity party for a minute, to sob and be ridiculous and vulnerable without being invalidated in that. I'm sure we all have our shit and have been through too much shit, it'd be really nice to have a safe space to just feel what we are feeling and that be okay, at least for that moment that we're feeling it.

I wish everyone here the best, but it certainly does not feel like the place for me.