Wives of Alcoholics Community Group

A forum of healing and help for wives of alcoholics.

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How do you live with the broken promises?

Pixie18
Pixie18

Hi, I am married to an alcoholic for 14 years now. His drinking has gradually become worse. I moved out for a week last year, and it seemed that things were getting back on track. He went to councelling, reduced his drinking and promised that he would fix stuff around the house. Unfortunately, the drinking never really stopped, and has now got worse. He started making quite abusive comments when he drinks; he says he can’t remember them the next day. I’m getting more and more frustrated. How do you cope? 

Sll82
Sll82
Mine hasn't got to that stage but I still sit the beautiful house that I created for us and listen to his bullsh*t ramblings.
He came down with a stinking cold yesterday and today he came home early from work because he felt so rough, asked me to go and get him some medicine from the pharmacy and he goes off and buys himself 12 cans!! Right now I want to bury the bastard.
I honestly don't want to live this life anymore but I'm so resentful that I would have to be the one that leaves and has to go through the horrific stress of moving because he won't! Then he will be evicted and because both our names are on the lease I will be saddled with his unpaid rent and be left to sort the house out (that I know he would trash!)
I want to click my fingers and be in my own place and not have to deal with the horrendous life shattering thing that is alcoholism.
sweetiepie212121
sweetiepie212121
I face an ignorant alcoholic daily who fully functions and owns a business. I worried last summer about his health which was a waste of time. There are no signs of him slowing down. He complains still about the bed situation. He is the first alcoholic with I hope I'm not jinxed. Nothing I do stops him drinking. He is a saint to everyone else.
Rose351
Rose351
So my coping mechanism is to stay gone as much as possible when he is home drinking alone in a dark room watching TV. Can't handle that anymore. Depresses me and enrages me at the same time. Makes me feel like I am so unimportant. The "buzz "is what matters...not me. I feel so worthless and empty inside. Why bother coming home? Heading to the gym rather than going home...need to feel better about myself and let him self destruct if that is what he needs to do. So sad.