So to recap, I met hubby in 1986, when I was 17. We have 3 daughters, who are now all in their 20's.
The last time I was here, I learnt a lot and read some co-dependency stuff. I learnt to take better care of myself. To do things for me.
It has been ok, not great but ok. I have been living my life and hubby has been continuing to drink cider.
He had the Australian flu a couple of years ago and started losing weight. He left his job. Then in March 2019 he fractured his back. His drinking got worse. His health has suffered too. He has now lost 2 stone in weight in two years. He does not eat much, has a hiatus hernia, he has alcoholic neuropathy too. Plus lots of other alcohol related issues. More recently he has had blackouts. In the past two weeks his dr has been sending him for lots of tests, we are waiting for the results.
My problem is, that finally I have the self confidence to leave him but I cant. If I leave him now, he will become a burden on our daughters. They would take him in and I cannot burden them with that. So I see no other choice but to stay with him. However I am living my life. We are about to move house and I am looking for a house for me, as I really do not think he has many more years ahead of him. I would say he is in stage 4 alcoholism. He does not want to give up drinking.
I am not hiding his illness from people anymore and I do not make anymore excuses for him. I tell people the truth, which hubby wouldn't like if he knew.
It is so hard, as he is an amazing guy, but he has an illness, that I think is going to end up killing him.
However I need to look after myself and my girls too. Only you ladies will understand.
This is my first post on this site or any related site for estranged parents. My estrangementfrom my 39-year-old son has been gradually getting worse the past few years, and has hit aclimax recently with his refusal to get vaccinated against covid, and it has now been nearly2 years since I have seen him. Our blocs and avoidance in our only form of communications,which are occasionally brief...
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