Wives of Alcoholics Community Group
A forum of healing and help for wives of alcoholics.
In past postings I have mentioned that my AH has accused me of not being supportive, etc, etc. I have also mentioned his questionable relationship he has had with his employee. I recently had gone into our cell phone account and found that he had been texting his employee every evening on a regular basis. My counselor then advised me that I should confront him about this, which I did and he then turned the conversation into to me not trusting him and that our marriage was over....don't know what to do at this point as I have dealt with so many things in the 22 years we have been married that to have him choose to end things is a real blow that I'm not sure how to deal with it...
Kellie
Bloomy, I feel so bad that on top of dealing with your AH you also have to deal with the cheating. They make us feel like crap to begin with. My AH was texting Some skank years back , they never spent time together but it made me feel like crap. I was the one here putting up with his crap day in and day out and she gets the good side of him ? He said the same thing to me that it was over , flipped it onto me as if I did something wrong. So I called her and asked her straight out wtf was going on with them! She wanted no part of the "crazy" wife and stopped talking to him. My thought was he took away all my happiness so I'm taking his and if its over than what could it hurt? After 22 years you deserve happiness and to know what true love is! If he thinks he is just gonna treat you like crap for 22 years and walk away for some skank, don't make it easy for him. You will be in my thought today . Big hug to you
Cadeer
Im so sorry you are dealing with this. This employee of his clearly had no idea what she is in for. The real him will come out. I know you hurt right now, but maybe in the late ng run he is doing oh a favor. Setting you free from dealing with the roller coaster of dealing with an AH. I don't know you, but in your words I hear a strong and compassionate woman. You deserve better than him and what he's done to you. I'm praying for your continued strength and sending s big hug. You will get through this.
IamDonetoday
Here's what I know, it takes 2 to make a marriage work and one to end it. I know this is hard to believe, but I think you'll be happier without him. Remind yourself, every time you get teary eyed and miss the thought of being married, remember what a complete as....hole he has been to you over the years. You deserve better and even being alone is better. Do everything you need to to take care of yourself. Lobby in the support system, don't have a big enough one, try other groups...whatever you can do that is healthy to get out of this. Read books, and get angry, he's a cheat, and just think of the lovely life the next chick is going to have with a cheating substance abuser! What comes around goes around ;)...hugs
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