Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
Probably one of the few groups that doesnt really want new members (well, doesnt want people to qualify to be a new member). I have been lurking here for awhile and its time to come in
In May of this year (2010), my love of nearly 40 years, was taken from me by a sudden heart attack. I was literally only out of the house for 30 minutes and came back to find her unconscious on the floor. I called 911 and feverishly performed CPR while waiting for the paramedics to arrive. They worked on her for an hour and when the fire captain came over to me and said its not looking good I felt an arrow through my heart. In the end they were not able to restart her heart and that was it.
The next week was hell as in addition to all the usual things I had to worry about my son getting home from Afghanistan in time for the service (but the Marines pulled out all the stops to make it happen!).
Coming up on three months into this new journey there is so much I want to say and even more that I want to ask but I will leave it at an introduction for now.
Ill close with this, with some clarity now on the events of the day I realized that just before I went out to do morning chores I hugged her, kissed her and said I love you. Those are the last words I said to her.
Just missing my Lil Bear
In May of this year (2010), my love of nearly 40 years, was taken from me by a sudden heart attack. I was literally only out of the house for 30 minutes and came back to find her unconscious on the floor. I called 911 and feverishly performed CPR while waiting for the paramedics to arrive. They worked on her for an hour and when the fire captain came over to me and said its not looking good I felt an arrow through my heart. In the end they were not able to restart her heart and that was it.
The next week was hell as in addition to all the usual things I had to worry about my son getting home from Afghanistan in time for the service (but the Marines pulled out all the stops to make it happen!).
Coming up on three months into this new journey there is so much I want to say and even more that I want to ask but I will leave it at an introduction for now.
Ill close with this, with some clarity now on the events of the day I realized that just before I went out to do morning chores I hugged her, kissed her and said I love you. Those are the last words I said to her.
Just missing my Lil Bear
Doye
Daily Strength is a wonderful place to start the healing. So many of the members here know and, most of all, understand the pain one another is experiencing. I pray you will find comforting words of encouragement as you begin this journey of loss. What a blessing to have others in a similar situation who reach out to help in your time of need, even while they are suffering the same pain of loss.
May this site help to sustain you while dealing with the everyday awfulness of learning how to survive without your Lil Bear. Hang in there. We are living proof that it can be done. TJ
welcome to DS, a place that none of us wanted to join, but are glad that others here understand and give support. I offer my condolences for your loss.
I am glad that you were able to tell her you loved her before she died, remembering that you said that to her will be of comfort to you.
I hope you post often, I wish you well
fishermansgirl
Debbie
I am so sorry for your loss and know how you feel. There are many things going around in your mind cluttered with if only's and should have's and what now's.
Use this site to express your feelings, ask your questions purge your grief here, we understand, we are with you.
God Bless you and bring you peace.
Linda
My dear hubby died 9 years ago, and I thought it would kill me. He was, as they say, my soul mate. We did everything together and were very happy. I had more of a chance to say goodbye tho than you did, as he had cancer, and died here in our home as he wanted to. He didn't want to be stuck in a hospital, where it's so cold and inpersonal.
The first year was the worst for me. I existed in a fog during that time, just trying to function. I decided I needed to talk to a grief counselor, so i talked with the Hospice people You don't need to have used their services to talk with their counselors, so if you feel you'd like to speak to someone, please give them a call. They'd be happy to help.
Just know that everyone grieves in their OWN time ~ there are no time limits in the amount of time you grieve. And people who say "you ought to be over it by now" are ignorant asses. I've had people tell me that after just 6 months!!! How do you get over years of loving someone in 6 months???? You don't. And you never will. You just learn to accept their passing, and learn to go on. God bless you and my prayers are with you. Take care. hugs, Lee
Dave
I AM SO SORRY THIS HAS HAPPENED TO YOU AND YOUR SON.
I WISH YOU STRENGTH, AND WHEN THAT IS RUNNING LOW, WE ARE ALL HERE FOR YOU!
JUDI