Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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Death & Dying
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What can I do to help??

alonedan
alonedan
My wife died not even a week ago. I can't count how many times I have been asked "What can I do to help?" or "Anything you want at all, just let me know."

Does anyone have any good answers to how to answer these questions? (Especially when I don't even know where I stand yet.)

The best help I have been able to allow people so far is to provide food for meals. I think that will help when I just don't feel like cooking.

Anyone else had luck with good ways to answer these questions??

Dan
saleeby
saleeby
Dan I am so sorry for your loss. I am only 3 weeks into this journey and know just what you are going through. Like others said food is a good start as cooking was an effort beyond my ability the first week and anything else that you come up against that you feel you can't handle reach out for those offers of help then. Sometimes the things that have to be done at this time are overwhelming and I just couldn't do them or couldn't do them alone. i reached out to those who had offered assistance and asked them to make the phone call or come with me to do paperwork to insure I didn't make any mistakes in my befuddled state. Also like others said reach out here. The day I found this site i was falling apart. I desperately needed to speak with others who had been through the same thing and understood my pain. Those who haven't experienced this can offer help but only those that have gone through it can really understand and help you take another step like these wonderful people have done for me. We are here for you and together we will get through this,
Take care of yourself.
Kathy
sunflowerblue
sunflowerblue
Dear Dan, I am so sorry for the loss of your dear wife. It is always good and nice to have friends and family around at first, offering their help, anything to help like just taking a drive in the country, or grocery shopping, take you to a nice dinner and movie, little fun things. It's important though to have time to yourself to just think and be left alone too.

DS and all the wonderful, supportive people here are a lifeline to us on our journey of grief. Stay with us, we are all here to help each other.
Hugs and sunflowers. Nanette
Rainbow27
Rainbow27
So sorry for your loss. I try to cook for friends now who have lost their spouse or call them and take them out to dinner and just let them talk. Just having someone there offering the gift of friendship helps.