Hi Prashant. I lost my husband almost three months ago. Sometimes I feel a lot of anger; other times I am hearbroken and other times I feel OK. I think this crazy mishmash of feelings is actually normal, although I have sort of lost my compass for what is "normal". I know what you mean about the upcoming holiday season................it is going to be very, very hard. I will keep you and your daughter in my prayers. Sylvia

I'm sorry for your loss. It is very hard. They should be here and they're not, and there is no comfort from it. We have to just push on in prayer for the sake of our kids who still deserve a happy life filled with good memories. I hope that today brings you a few moments of peace. Praying for you.

Thankyou Sylvia and Porkchopcash.

I went to a hospice group for widows and widowersupport and one of the things that were said was "you are in the place you need to be. "
That angered me, but I came to understand it's meaning over the years. I fall back on that often in time of need. It helps me navigate through the difficult times and gain perspective on the present. It gives me hope that I will survive and even flourish. You can too.

Prashant: today is 13 months since my husband died. It's still so hard, the past few days have been difficult. If I'm not in tears, I'm on the verge, even as I write this while having a pedicure!! Get out and be with people if you can. I find being in my head makes it worse. Finding a grief or bereavement group may help. It's true that things change and change again. I have weeks where I am ok and then get hit with heartache and miss him so terribly. Accepting this is so difficult. Concentrate on your little girl and yourself if possible. Time does help. God Bless and I wish you peace on your journey. Marybeth

Do anything which will make you feel a little lighter though nothing helps at this time . I try to not remember the dreadful day , and just remember the good thoughts . Nothing helps absolutely , parents with me are my only savior . Anyone in the world who understands and is close to you , try leaning on them for emotional support .

My friend I have been there. Just last year. August of 2015. My wife went to heaven one morning unannounced. I returned from work and she was gone. I could do nothing but stand and stare. But she never came back. I screamed, cried and begged but still nothing. I was facing the holidays right after. First hurdle was our anniversary in Sept. Only a few weeks after loosing her.
But after a little over a year it has gotten better. And I will make you this promise, it will get better over time. I used to focus on each second to get thru each minute to get thru each hour to get thru each day then on and on. Sometimes you have to break it down to that level to make it. But it will get better. One thing to always keep in mind, you don't get over this. You learn ways to live with it. Don't ever let anyone tell you it's time you move on and get over it. Run from that person. You do this on your time not anyone else's. Take care of you. You have been left with a special gift from your wife. So taking care of you is taking care of your little girl.
I truly know what you mean about the holidays approaching. My wife used to put Christmas lights around the top of the ceiling thru out the house, with garland. So many we never used the regular lights, just those. And every room had to have something in it. No room left out. Just one of the sweet memories of her around this time. So I'm with you there.
But give it time and don't rush yourself. Take all the time you need. After a little over one year it has gotten easier. You will go thru hell getting there but you will.
What helped was finding others who knew. Those who had been there and could relate. Somehow knowing someone else has gone thru this helped in not feeling so alone in it. So continue to reach out to others.

Please take care of yourself.
Peace, Tim

I have renamed the 'phrase moving on' to 'moving forward'. To me moving on is something you do after a breakup. This situation was not a mutuality agreed upon or for the betterment of one or both parties rather it was a situation that was handed to you. You will never get over the loss you were dealt rather you find a way to move forward. Moving forward you will be carrying all the love and memories you created- you never have to give up that love. A remarkable thing about people is we can love more that on person at a time and in different ways. The loved for our departed shifts from physical to spiritual but its still there. So that's why i call it moving forward because its you taking your love, now in a different form, with you as you redefine yourself on this journey we call life.

Thanks Laurie, i do believe love does shift to spiritual. Moving forward after losing a person who meant everything in your life is harsh reality of life and very hard to accept aswell. Its heart wrenching and emotionally draining. Finding a higher purpose to live on without her can keep me alive.