Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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Death & Dying
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valentines day

papa11
papa11
this saturday is valentines day....last year i brought my wife home a giant bouquet of beautiful flowers and a card telling her how much i loved her and that she was my best friend and i was the luckiest man on earth to have her for my wife because we were soul mates...this year i have no idea what to do...if money didnt matter and i had no responsibilities i would load up my truck and just drive, each day a new ride somewhere..i dread each day, it hasnt gotten easier and i really dont believe it ever will...valentines was always special, it was my chance each year to make sure she knew how much i loved her...i got to spoil her and she couldnt complain and never did anyway, because it made me happy..my favorite valentines was one year we watched the notebook the movie was fine but the ending dyeing together like that was what made that movie for me...i wanted that ending so bad..so this valentines day will be different....i guess i just wanted to know what other people were doing especially those of us that are alone. im not looking for cheery just some ideas to stay busy.
thanks
Community Leadercliffskat
cliffskat
@Liz, that's a great quote - thanks for that!

Love and Hugs,
Martha
Decibel-Places
Decibel-Places
If you want to cry, watch some sentimental movies on Lifetime... for me, crying is cathartic, and assures me I still have feelings, I'm not numb.

I sent a Valentines Day ecard to my daughter (25 yo & married) from World Wildlife Fund, saying I made a donation to share our love for animals. I had considered sending her flowers. The problem is that her husband is terrific in so many ways, but he doesn't get sentimentality. I think he did nothing on their first Valentines Day together, but she's training him. I did not want to possibly out-do him, that would be terrible.

I might be kindling a new romance. It's been almost 7 months since my wife died. Even while she was alive, she used to tell me "Go out and find a younger woman" (she was 8 years older than me) but I would never do that to her, I was never even tempted. On my last day at my last contract job (yesterday) I got up the nerve to ask a coworker out to lunch - she seemed to like me, and she hits my sweet spot: pretty, smart, and has a sense of humor. We had a nice lunch, and we agreed to see each other next week. Even without romance, it's nice to have a new friend who is also a geeky intellectual, and is nice to people.
praised
praised
As I wrote on another post, what people do on Valentine's Day, we alway did. He would buy me gifts, just because. We ate out most of the time and would do a getaway on the weekends. But because it was Valentine's Day, we would give each other card with a gift card inside. His cards were always more romantic than mine.