Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
Mgould
I was inspired by the post from FM0528 about songs to add this -
After my husband died someone asked if we had a song. If I could pick a song it would be - "Total Eclipse of the Heart" from 1983. On our honeymoon this video played over and over on TV - and I loved it. Could not remember the title though - only "Bright Eyes". (found it online)
Weeks after he died I went to Best Buy to look for a CD with the song. I walked in and could not remember the name of the song or the singer. Reluctantly began to walk out and saw a handful of CDs near the door and one said "Hits of the 80's". I picked it up - 1st song - Total Eclipse. Seemed like fate. Bought the CD and played the song over and over while driving for months and months.
Six months later family went on a trip - my husband's favorite - LV & CA. Before leaving I kind of said - I wish you could give us a sign you know we're going on this trip - but I thought - what can he do?
On the plane a movie played - what did they play several times? Total Eclipse of the Heart. My dtr was driving on an express once & the car started shaking. She yelled - Dad help me. Suddenly the car stopped shaking then the song Total Eclipse came on the radio. Several years ago I went to LV with some DS members. First time I walked in the buffet I picked up a plate and - it began playing over the intercom. Last but not least - Last week I took my mother back to her hometown in NY. Going from Chgo to NY we should not come to a sign that says "welcome to Ann Arbor" (MI) - but we did. When we finally got on the right expressway I said to my mother - ok - now we're going the right way. Right after I said that - Total Eclipse of the Heart came on the radio.
While this may not have been "our" song while he was alive - it is OUR song now.
After my husband died someone asked if we had a song. If I could pick a song it would be - "Total Eclipse of the Heart" from 1983. On our honeymoon this video played over and over on TV - and I loved it. Could not remember the title though - only "Bright Eyes". (found it online)
Weeks after he died I went to Best Buy to look for a CD with the song. I walked in and could not remember the name of the song or the singer. Reluctantly began to walk out and saw a handful of CDs near the door and one said "Hits of the 80's". I picked it up - 1st song - Total Eclipse. Seemed like fate. Bought the CD and played the song over and over while driving for months and months.
Six months later family went on a trip - my husband's favorite - LV & CA. Before leaving I kind of said - I wish you could give us a sign you know we're going on this trip - but I thought - what can he do?
On the plane a movie played - what did they play several times? Total Eclipse of the Heart. My dtr was driving on an express once & the car started shaking. She yelled - Dad help me. Suddenly the car stopped shaking then the song Total Eclipse came on the radio. Several years ago I went to LV with some DS members. First time I walked in the buffet I picked up a plate and - it began playing over the intercom. Last but not least - Last week I took my mother back to her hometown in NY. Going from Chgo to NY we should not come to a sign that says "welcome to Ann Arbor" (MI) - but we did. When we finally got on the right expressway I said to my mother - ok - now we're going the right way. Right after I said that - Total Eclipse of the Heart came on the radio.
While this may not have been "our" song while he was alive - it is OUR song now.
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We live in Florida on the Intracoastal Waterway. Yesterday at 6 in the morning I was sitting in gazebo talking to him. Can you see me? Can you hear me? Can you feel me? Give me a sign if you do.
Right at that moment I saw a sailboat my husbands passion. When boat passed by there was a man smiling at me. I could read GA boat from Georgia, where my husbands from, where he is now. Name of the boat was Glory days pass me by. Coincidence? I do not think so.
By the way Total Eclipse is one of my favorite songs.
"And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn
Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice
Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling
And I didn't feel a thing, So baby don't feel no pain
Just smile back"
I know that was his way of letting me know he was ok.