I have learned to smile, and yes laugh.

I am a new person, that took a little time to accept.

Hugs, Holly

I actually crave being a different person now - it's terrifying, and exciting at the same time. I never had to ''think'' about being someone different. I had my support, I had love, I was able to make a difference in someones life and give him my love too. I had security. When my world was rocked with Jerry's death, I thought for a time that I could never go on. Maybe it's time, maybe it's healing, maybe I'm kidding myself. I crave a different me now, I'm peeling back some layers that should have been examined a long time ago. I'm not looking for someone to complete me - I need to be complete on my own - if it happens that I find someone it will be another miracle from G-d. The first miracle was my husband.

So true.

Exploring the new me...adjusting...and that's okay.

Carla

Hi, the person I use to be is gone now too. A new me is developing. I wish everyday I could get my old life back and who I was. I see that I'm changing everyday, and wonder if other people see it too?

This is so true!!! I keep trying to explain this to people and they don't get it. My mom told me tonight that she wants the old me back. I told her that will never happen. I can't go back to that person. My world has changed and so have I. I feel like i need to change my clothes, car, hair and job to fit the new me but I don't want to make any crazy changes right now. Everyone says not to change anything for at least 6 months. I'm not even near 6 months right now.

myoneandonly.....Hi highly recommend waiting a year for any
major changes, I did somethings too fast and regret them, like
giving his dress clothes away the following week... wish now I
would have waited as I saw a beautiful quilt that I could have had
made...take your time

Oh my so true, losing a partner is not the same as falling down, getting a scrape or a bruise then standing up and walking away, this horrible journey is one big bruise. No one can understand if they have not walked in our shoes eh? Hugs, Wendy

Four months for me. Knew first day nothing was ever going to be the same. Did not try to be the old me. After 39 years of marriage not possible to be the same person. Must change to survive and open new doors of life. Do not want to but must or stay in that horrible place of grief. There is no worse path in life , I think, but must go on for respect and honor of the lost one. So hard and so sad.

I feel the same way. I know I am not the same person I was before my Larry went home. Never will be again. My friends tell me they see the difference in me and tell me that they wish I could be the same person. They just don't understand. I try and try to get back to the same person, but it just doesn't work. My heart is not in it and I will always be this person. I don't laugh as much and I don't see life the same either. It has been 14 months for me and I don't see anything changing.

Losing my Larry was the worst thing that has ever happened to me in my entire life and I am trying to honor him by going on with my life, but it just won't be the same life as far as my personality goes anyway.

Sending you hugs,
-Cathy