I am having that problem. There are some places we always went to together - restaurants, for example - that I can't go to alone yet. Thank you for the insight. We have to deal with three issues in widowhood: (1) missing that one special person who was the center of our lives for decades (2) getting used to being alone (3) trying to do all of the things that he used to do (I still haven't figured out how to work his drill).

The "firsts" are always the hardest. I survived my husband's sudden passing. I tell myself that now I can survive anything.
Linda

For myself I forced myself to go to all the palces so I could get it over with...I did cry the first times...but God got me through it. My last, first is coming up....the first time to file as a single or widow..whatever it is you file as...more tears to come...but I will get through this too...:)I think Ive been through the worse already.

I forced myself to go to the diner where we always went. I sat in a booth where very few people could see me. It was one of the hardest thing I have ever done.

Today I tried to go to the grocery store....something that is so common. This time it was so overwhelming. I kept looking at everything and thinking...Carson would like this or Carson would want that. I had to get out of there before I broke down. Thank you for sharing

It has been a year now, and I still see things on the shelf at the grocery that he and only he liked. Like anchovies. Yuck. But they reminded me of him. He loved the garden section. He could spend hours in there, he loved flowers so much. He always selected the least expensive toilet paper but getting the unit price. Darn if I can do that. Each roll has a different number of squares. Also, double or single thickness. It was an art with him. He loved egg nog. Would drink it like an addict (no alcohol). He loved Wendy's frosties. I could write a book about his favorites. I'm rambling....sometimes it puts a smile on my face. Thanks for listenting!
Kathleen

@newroads It is encouraging to hear that now in time you see those things in stores and it puts a smile on your face.

@owensmom I was there too. I at one time could not go grocery shopping, I changed to different store to get what I needed, got it, and got out. I would cry at most anything like things I would normally get if Roger was here. It makes me cry now to think of those things. I had to get rid of some things only Roger would eat here, knowing I will never buy those for him is so sad right now.

Going to the grocery store is still so hard for me at 7 weeks. That was our thing. One night a week we would head out with the list and the coupons and see how much money we could save. It was our game together and we made it fun. I have been twice since he died. Once by myself and spent 30 minutes crying in the aisles. Once with my oldest son with me, just so we could get it done. I hate doing anything without him, but some things are harder than others. Thanks for sharing and letting others know they are not alone.

I'm dreading when the next Star Trek movie comes out. We were both trekkies and always went to the first primier of every movie. We'd take the day off no matter what. Now when the next one comes out I couldn't picture going alone. Thirty years of Trek primiers and this one I'll skip. It's going to be hard.