It can go either way, at this point, it's unknown -
However, If I were you I'd try to keep in contact with phone calls, cards, email & visits -
Naturally, what you do depends on if you're feeling up to it -
If all you can do is email a "thinking of you"; that is sufficient -
It allows Roby's kids & grandkids to know you still think & care for them very much -
Hopefully, they respond in kind -

As for bio granny -
Jealousy creates bullies, if she has behaved like this in the past, just do the best you can during family functions by avoiding her as much as possible -
And don't be concerned about her feelings; let her deal with them on her own -

My kids haven't seen their father's parents in 4 years -
They chosse not to have contact with them for very good reasons -
Hallelujah!
They're the kind of people a person will berate then have to forgive themself for choosing to be in their presence - *spit*

Good luck ~

All you can do is keep the door open for them to keep in contact with you. From that point on it's up to them. You can only control your actions, they are responsible for their choices. I caution you not to place expectations on them or they may fail to live up to what you wish. A lot depends on their age, maturety, and lifestyle. Whatever they chose be satisfied with your choices in life, that is how we find contentment in ourself. I hope you find the future one of satisfaction in yourself. Hugs, Sharon

I have three step children, all grown now. The oldest is 32, but she has children. She is the only one I keep in touch with, the other two I am not close to, as cold as that may sound, but that is the truth.

Over time I don't expect to be closer to them. I love the grandchildren and that is why I will stay here. I will keep my door open, with a foot firmly planted in the way of the door so as not to let them in of their own free will, but I do not expect them to be around for me, to support me when I become ill or need help. I am on my own and I know it.

What would your wife wish you to do?

Roby had 3 daughters and there are 7 grandchildren. Only two are old enough to really remember their Pappy and remember me. He did ask his girls to take care of me, but I don't expect them to be there for me that much.
None live that close, two are out of state. They have a mother and in laws and alot relatives on those sides. Roby's parents died when he was a young man, he was an only child and doesn't have that many relatives on his side.
The only family functions that ever included us and their mothers family were the weddings. Never included in showers for weddings or babies or birthdays.
Knowing how their mother has always controled the visits and time, I figure at some point any contact will be the occasional text or email.
They never really gave their Dad alot of their time so I doubt they will have time for me. This last Christmas they all came and spent 4 hours with him, they spent a week with their Mom.
I'm trying to prepare myself, the door is always open and I do check in with them and make sure they are doing ok and there is some unfinished business such family pictures and furniture that I think they should have and treasure, but we'll see how that goes.

I have two grown step-children who have actually become closer to me since their father died. I think part of that is that they regret not taking more time to visit and keep closer when he was alive.I feel sad that they now have to live with those regrets but I am sure my husband would want me to remain as close as possible to them now. My step daughter actually sent me flowers on Valentines Day, nine days after Bill died, with a very loving message. Bill's son looks so much like him and has a very similiar way about him so it is both comforting and hard to see him. I consider Bill's children a blessing in my life and I hope they will continue to be. I did not raise them but I will make every effort to keep them in my life . I love them, they are part of Bill. -Deb

I have a step-daughter and two grandkids. I had the same fear, but we've kept in touch. I used to see them every month but now they live in another state, so it's just like biological kids that move away--you see them less and less. Still there's phone and email. I get pictures too. She was 11 when we married.

Wanted to add. My step-daughter said that she would take me in if I got sick. I told her not to do it. Put me in a nursing home. I do not want her sacrificing herself for me. Told her to just stop by so people know I have someone. i made the decision to be biologically childfree so I knew this day was coming for a long time. I've asked God to take me home in my 70s somewhere regardless of my perceived health.

It's the opposite for me - he had 3 girls and none of all of them stopped talking to him. The last one stopped 2 years ago and now she wants to talk to me - I just can't bring myself to talk to her - I am so angry about the way she (they) treated their father. He loved them so much. I am hoping I can get over this anger and have a relationship with her again but right now that is not a priority on my part.

I would say just keep the door open and see what happens.

I understand mkromano's response, and think Kitty Kai's advice is good. My stepsons are grown, and a danger to society; very heavy drug use. I hate the way they treated their Father, and we severed contact with them over 3 yrs. ago, after doing cartwheels to get them drug-free. DH spoke to them a handful of times a year by phone, but didn't even want to go see them, fearing what he'd find.
I'm doing what my husband wanted, and what he told me to do. I have nothing to do with them. They live 4 states away, and as per his request, I will be getting a big dog.
Not every family is picture perfect. Even though I have no children of my own, I'm better off with no contact, and probably, so are they.

Please tell them how important it is to be there to support and love them; talk about the connections you hope to strengthen. Make sure they know how much you love/care for them, and that should go a long way toward keeping them close to you. Gid bless.