Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
I have not been around for awhile and i am so sorry. I just have so much happening and in such a deep depression that I feel I would be a bad influence on those who are recovering now.
It is five months now so why do I feel the same? I finally had to put our house up for sale last week. Today was my first showing and it hurt me so badly to have strangers look at our home and closets. Does that make any sense at all? I was very respectful and talked with teh people and they mentioned how "sweet" I was..when inside I was hurting and angry. Angry at the situation, angry at Joe for leaving me with all of this and angry at myself for feeling angry?
No one comes to visit anymore. Even my own girls are very busy working six days a week so they need a day to themselves. I am stuck just packing and giving away furniture all on my own now. I gave almost everything to people who needed it and it made me feel good at first. Then as the things were leaving the house, I cried...no I sobbed so loud and told Joe how sorry i was that I couldnt keep the house going.
I know this is a confusing post, but my life is spiraling down each day and I am confused and scared of what is next. I have no plan and no future and no mind right now to even think of making one.
Thanks for listening, Ann
It is five months now so why do I feel the same? I finally had to put our house up for sale last week. Today was my first showing and it hurt me so badly to have strangers look at our home and closets. Does that make any sense at all? I was very respectful and talked with teh people and they mentioned how "sweet" I was..when inside I was hurting and angry. Angry at the situation, angry at Joe for leaving me with all of this and angry at myself for feeling angry?
No one comes to visit anymore. Even my own girls are very busy working six days a week so they need a day to themselves. I am stuck just packing and giving away furniture all on my own now. I gave almost everything to people who needed it and it made me feel good at first. Then as the things were leaving the house, I cried...no I sobbed so loud and told Joe how sorry i was that I couldnt keep the house going.
I know this is a confusing post, but my life is spiraling down each day and I am confused and scared of what is next. I have no plan and no future and no mind right now to even think of making one.
Thanks for listening, Ann
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My 6mo twin DD's are EBF and just started rice cereal on the first. Everything has been going fine except this morning one of them had a diaper rash (lots of redness around her anus). I read this as one of the signs of an allergy. BUT I did just buy a different brand diaper yesterday (which they have used randomly before w/no issues). Do you think its the cereal or the diaper? Im ready to start...
I am sending a tight quiet hug to you right now. no words just a comfortable hug for a few minutes.
When Carmelo passed, I had no money to stay in my home, I had to move in with family from Texas to Calif. I know what you mean about packing all alone and giving things away.
I had a garage sale and watched people try to barter me down on our wonder things we had together, it hurt so deep inside but I had to sell things to afford the gas.
I was devastated Ann, just like you but I did it and you will do it. Eventually you will see the things that you Joe had together are just that things and they are needed to give away or sell so you can go on in your life.
Do not feel guilty for not being able to keep the house, a better home will come for you. Your path has already been planned and you will see you will make it through this. I have not stopped praying for you my good friend.
I wish you could move over here, I still have a open room, you know.
Hugs & God Bless,
Judy
Of course it is ripping you apart as this is stuff that Joe and you had but as Judy mentioned they are only things. What you will always treasure are the memories and no one can take that away from you.
As far as a plan, I think many of us are still not sure what that is either. I really hope things turn around for you so you at least have some sense of stability.......wishing you some peace and healing in the days ahead....hugs
It is still hell.
As I part with things that remond me of my husband, I tell myself I have lost the most precious thing in my life. Compared to losing him, everything else is just stuff.
He will always be in my heart regardless of where I am and what I possess.
Maybe you can take a trip to the musuem or stop somewhere and have a cup of tea. Take a book with you. It will make you less aware that you're by yourself. You're in my prayers.
I had to give our home back to the bank and they had to auction it off,I just could not afford to keep it,Pat loved our home,but I had no choice,I now live in a singlewide that I paid 5500 for,its a peice of junk,and I have to rent the lot,but the trailer is mine.I hated having to leave our home but I have alot of precious memories and I am sure you will too.I am at almost 8 months and while it is some easier it still hurt's BAD.
Blessing's to you Mary
I am sorry that you are experiencing so much change, most of it by yourself now.
It has been 34 months since my husband left this world. Like you, I am alone, and everyone seems to have gone on with their lives. Today, I accept that just as I do that I must live a life without my husband. It is part of the new normal, this journey that none of us wanted to take, but must now have to face it daily by ourselves.
Selling one's home is difficult, clearly. Is it possible a friend or neighbor can come over to keep you company for a little while?
I wish you peace today. Remember, every day is a new one.
Hugs, LP
I can only echo what's already been said here.
I had to sell Greg's house recently in short sale. And it IS hard to do, but yu know what? Just as has been said already. The house is a house. The love you shared in that house? Is inside your heart and inside your memories. No one can EVER take those away from you EVER.
I wish I could be of more help to you, and wish I lived closer to you.
I can send all the BIGGEST cyber hugs I can muster though, as many as you need. Wishing your peace in your days and in yur heart. You so deserve some peace my friend Diane
(((((Hugs Sadie))))