only in time. Lots of time. All relationships have their ups and downs and when you find yourself thinking of good things that's a plus.
Keep trying that and give yourself time. Its the only thing on our side besides friends/family, but within ourselves time.
It' been a year and a half without my loved one hubby of 28-1/2 yrs.
its still hard but I am getting a little more accustomed to being alone in this new life. I have plenty to do when I want to do it. I am still suffering from depression but going forward little by little. There are the days of losing hope for whatever reason, but know that our special other would want us to go on and stay healthy and take care of ourselves. And from here what we hope for is to visit them in our dreams. If they could come to us it would be wonderful, but dreams are a way to see and hear them. Oh it's hard. Just hold on and make your way a step here, a project there and you will find some satisfaction in it.
Good luck

I feel proud of you. In the face of so much grief you extended yourself and went to that interview. You answered what I think is a stupid question quite well I thought. I remember a time in my life where I very actively sought employment for over 6 months before landing a job. I was not grieving at that time and I found the whole process overwhelming. I hope you can feel proud of you as I believe your partner would feel proud of you. To answer your question...will there ever be a respite? Yes, painfully, slowly, gradually. Don't give up on yourself or that future job. Blessings to you. ~~ Cheryl

I am sorry for your lost. I was on a job for 14 years with the same company. Then the division was sold to another company a year after my husband passed. I was interviewed by the new company. The interviewer informed me there is no opening for me at the time. I didn't really care if I get another job or not, in fact I was looking forward to be laid off. He didn't know I lost my spouse. I did answer professionally and bid for my group to get new jobs for the ladies I was in charged at the time. At the end of the transition period, he hired everyone in my group including me to his group. I worked for him for 2 years and retired this year. He did tell me that I did a good job and they were prepared to train me for new jobs. My point is doing the best you can under the circumstances.

In future you might outsmart the question by turning it into a positive about yourself. "ld be doing something that utilized my skills and hard work ethic and contributed to the success of the company." Hope that helps. Martha Jean

Snowalone -

I have found myself in situations where people were asking
me things and I stumbled over the words in my answers. My
brain has been to be barely functioning for eight months as
most of my thoughts are concentrated on my wife and her
passing on the 28th of August, 2015.

I finally decided several months ago to just be up front with
people. If I am asked a question at work or anywhere and I
can't seem to answer, I tell them the truth. I am struggling
with grief and it overwhelms me at times and my brain is
not up to par, so to speak. To my great surprise, people
( many are total strangers ) have been very compassionate,
kind and patient. They have also shared details have their
journeys through grief and it has helped me at times.

I tend to analyze myself a great deal as I try to find answers
having to do with my grief. I finished with shock in the early
months as I moved into reality. Acceptance is trying to
enter now and I am fighting it but I know she is not coming
back. I shall have no choice but to accept it as some point.

The one thing I have been unable to deal with at present is
loneliness. It is not loneliness for people. It is loneliness for
her. She was all I ever needed. She was my whole world.

I do know my wife would want me to keep my head together
( as much as it can be ) and I know she would want me to
survive. She would not want me to do anything foolish.

As mentioned by Mrs. L. from TX, I am hoping my wife will
visit me in my dreams. That would be a huge blessing and
I go to sleep each night with that hope.

Snowalone - I have learned over the past several months
that I cannot deal with this pain / grief on a large scale all
at once. I take it one minute at a time and one hour at a
time and, some days, I manage to make it through most
of the day without shedding tears until I get home or at
least away from work. I don't think about tomorrow or
next week, next month or next year. I think only about
the present and the fact I have to make it through the
next hour. I have had to learn to do that but it is getting
me through the days and nights.

You are in my thoughts.

Darrell in Texas

thank you for your replies and kind suggestions. It really helps to know that someone understands, will even make an effort to listen or read, and can advise sometimes (beloved cat Alice, I've found, will only talk to me about cat treats ;()

I simply find it hard to polish myself up to a glowing patina now when I most need it...cuz I've been thinking/ dwelling/ caring of other things...probably not the healthiest thing to do. I agree doing something, ANYTHING, tends to be helpful. But this is an emotional disability indeed, an invisible one, but certainly feels a sad affliction.

Thanks all. Don't know what I would do without you texty people!