Scott this is a difficult time for all of us. you should not put any pressure on yourself to do anything except get through each moment. there will be plenty of time to put your wife's belongings away if you ever decide to do it. If you are not sure that is what you want to do I would leave everything where it is. Once you move it, give it away or pack it up you can not change your mind later. I am almost 8 months in and everything in the bathroom and closets remain exactly where Jeanne left them. I find comfort in having her personal belongings next to me. Go slow and take the time to grieve your loss and all of the changes that have happened to your life. god bless Dave

Scott, I lost my sweet husband just a few days over 8 months ago, in a freak accident. I had to remove some things, as it gave me too much pain to see them, but nothing else has been removed, still have the pictures in the same place, still have his toothbrush, but i did put it in the drawer, and have moved a few items into a drawer. I had a close friend make me a "sean" quilt, all off his shirts, pants, pajamas, undershirts, even his ilitary fatigues, and even a pair of his underwear, lol. It gives me comfort to wrap him around me each night as I go to sleep, our little girl loves it so much too, i have to fight her for just even a corner of it, lol. Time doesn't heal all wounds, you just learn to accept the fact that they are no longer physically here, but I do beliee spiritually sean is with me always.. big hugs,

Scott, I am so sorry you are feeling such pain. My husband passed at home under hospice care. The only thing I wanted out of my house was all the medical crap. He was on peratonial dialysis for two plus years and they removed nearly 100 boxes of solution and equipment. I haven't removed any of his personal possesions and at this time I have no intention to until "I" am ready, if I ever am. It does get better with time though at this stage in your journey I am sure you cannot even imagine that yet. And yes it seems to come in waves. But we must go on, we weren't given the choice to go with them. Just take care of you for now, everything else can wait! Hugs and Love, Michele

Unlike some, the quicker I removed his things the better I was. It hurt too much to see any of his things. I couldn't bear to look at pictures at all. Everyone is different, take your time. You'll know when its right
Rachel

Dear Scott, I am so very sorry for your loss. There are no words that can ease the pain you are in. It takes time, lots and lots of time. Many of my biggest breakdowns occurred while driving or showering at the end of the day. Be kind to yourself, you are suffering one of life's cruelest hurts. Peace to you, Lori

Scott, You have my Deepest Sympathy. At a month, try to take one hour at a time. Slowly, you will feel a little better. I can very well remember trying to take care of My husband's tools, clothes , all of his belongings. Actually I still have his robe and his favorite denim shirt in my closet along with a suitcase of his bathing suits and t-shirts. It's been nine years and I have been able to move forward but having those pieces mean the world to me.
I did ask for help with choosing carefully what to do with his things. Perhaps a friend or relative can help you with this. Or, it may not be the time. There is no rush. Take all the time you need. Every one here can relate to what you are going through. I wish you peace and strength. Dolores

Scott, we all can relate to the pain you are having being surrounded by you wife's belongings and the things she touched. I am at 8 months and have not moved or removed hardly anything. Everything in our house she had a hand on. She was the designer, shopper, architect of nearly everything to do with the house. Of course I was involved in some of the decisions but ultimately it was her touch that made our house a home. I can't bring myself to think of what I am going to do with all of her clothes and other belongings so for now they will stay put as if she were still here. Stay strong and peace to you. ~Pete

If those items give you a sense of closeness with her leave them where they are. There's no time limit on anything with grief. I used to touch his clothes in the drawer and remember him wearing them. I slept with his sweatshirt for a very long time. It gave me an odd sense of nearness to him. When the time to move them comes, you will know and it will feel right. Sharon

Scott, it's been almost 2 month for me and everything is as he was going to walk back into the house. I know he won't but what is the hurry? I left everything the same way. In some ways I think it makes me feel like I'm not alone. Someone else is living there too. In time I'm sure I'll start giving stuff to goodwill, but for now no. - hugs Arlene

This may sound odd, but I really wish I had done this: If something has her scent on it, consider sealing it in something airtight.
I am not encouraging anyone to sit in a closet and rock and cry while smelling something that reminds them of their spouse, but there may come a time where that will be painful and yet comforting.
I have longed for something that still smelled like him soooo many times. I wish so much I had preserved something as best I could have.

Go slow, there is no time table for anything to happen. Things can be done later, but you can't undo things done. The things I regret getting rid of were all done to appease someone determined to help me move along. I understand now it wasn't to ease my pain, but to make them feel I was making progress and I regret it.
Just say no to thugs is my new motto. It was decidedly unhelpful in my case. Do whatever feels right and be kind to yourself. I am so sorry for your loss.

Scott, my deepest sympathy. I am at the five month mark and like Rachel and a few other people I had to immediately remove my fiance stuff from our home. It was good for me but I think you being able to still have it around is an amazing testament to your strength and love. One month is nothing in the long term journey we are all on. Sending my love and a big hug. Hang in there

Scott, I just did my hubby's laundry in the beginning. Not much else. But I feel connected with his stuff around me still. Once in awhile I hug a big armful of his clothes in the closet just to feel him and smell his scent. It's ok though. When I'm ready I will know. And so will you. Everyday is hard but yet we go on. Remember the good and don't dwell on the bad. Skip the shoulda woulda coulda phase. It really doesn't help to second guess anything. You can't change a thing so just move forward. Know that you were loved and she will always be with you. Be strong...we are all here for you.
Hugs
Darcie

At one month, I was practically a zombie...it's been 7 months now, and am doing a little better, but still crying and missing him every day...
With regard to your wife's belongings, go at your own pace...There is no hurry, and you need to do what is comfortable for you...I still have my husband's wheelchairs, shoes and other belongings in the back bedroom where he spent so much time toward the end...my son goes in there sometimes, but I can't...it still smells like him..and it's just another painful reminder..

The timeline for going through personal belongings is different for everyone. I was one of those that had to go through everything right away. I just couldn't take it all with me. I kept a tote filled with all the things that meant something to him and me. I got rid of the rest. It was too painful and overwhelming to hold on to everything.

October 29th will be the 1 year anniversary of his passing. I still think about and miss him every single day. You are the only one who knows the right time for you. It will come when you are ready. I know it doesn't seem like it now, but it does get easier with time.

I did save shirts that smelled like my husband and it does give me comfort on days that I'm unconsoleable. I also have a big pillow next to me that I put his favorite cologne on that I can fall asleep when I have insomnia. My husband went to jail 3 times for dui's so I guess I learned the trick of the smell thing early on in our relationship. He would go for stretches of time 3 months to 1 year at a time away from me. I hope this helps you a little. Hugs Donna