My heart goes out to you and your boys. You have suffered a terrible, terrible loss. The suddenness also throws you for a loop because as you said, you had plans and goals. The feeling you have now in your gut and soul are normal in early grief. I could not see any future at all because the one I wanted would never be. However, with the passage of time, love from my friends and family, and support from the group here, I have moved into a good life. The sadness will always be with me but I have love from many sources now. Although it is not the life I wanted, it is a good life nonetheless. I pray for your continued healing and for you and your boys to love and help each other. Keep coming here! It validates everything you are feeling and thinking. You are not alone. Hugs to you and your kids.

I wish you that "Getting Better" it comes with time. Not any way of jumping over things seems to work. We are here, for you.

I and others know the pain of the cancer beast, especially painful when it comes of of the blue to someone healthy and vibrant.

My heart.
Jewells

I am so sorry that you have to experience this horrific pain. I lost my husband 3 months ago, and told a friend today, that although I am still sad, it actually IS getting better. When I read your post, I was reminded of how horrible those earlier days were.

I am not saying that even at three months it is easy. I have not had one tear free day, but despite the fact that you want to scream "LIAR!", when peiople tell you it gets easier....believe them. It does.

It must be hard for the boys too... I will hold you all in my prayers.

I can understand totally. My husband and I had plans too and then he was diagnosed with cancer and ten weeks later he was gone. It's more than a loss of the person you love it's the loss of the life you've building.
Im so sorry to welcome you to the group, but I hope it will be a good thing to have found us. For me it was the only place I felt understood totally and found hope to see me through the days ahead. Sharon

I am so sorry for your loss. My wife went to Heaven 9 weeks ago and I have two teenage boys. I feel just like you still. The feeling in my gut is brutal. I come here regularly for hope. This is by far the most helpful for me. Hang in there.

I'm at 11 weeks still tryng to figure it all out. The feeling in your gut does ease up a little at a time but, it is still there. My wife said when she was diaganosed, it is what it is, and thats what grief is too. So you come here often forsupport. This is the only thing that keeps me sane, these prople at least understand and have some good advise, for us. We had a 5 month fight then it was over, my whole life changed. Now I have to learn how to deal with it. It is what it is. God bless you and your boys.

It's not easy and all I can say is one day at a time. I lost my husband 5 months ago on his 39th birthday on a car accident. His life was taken suddenly and we weren't able to say goodbye or even see him for the last time. My husband was in the wrong place at the wrong time, since then my life has not been the same. Everyday is a challenge. I also have two wonderful kids 9 & 15 whom I live for each day. All I can tell you is that during our grief it's okay to feel and express our feelings the way we choose too. Don't let anyone tell you when your grief should end. The best thing you can do is let everything out at any time and any place. Talk to you kids as much as you can and talk about your wife if you are up to it. I discovered that talking about my husband brings good memories and bring happiness for my kids and I. You can say that it just takes us back when we were a happy family.... May God bless you and your kids....

I am sorry for the loss of your wife. You have found the right place to be. I lost my husband as well to cancer. One moment at a time is my first suggestion to you. God Bless