Oh I understand. My "schedule" is not exactly the same, but it seems that I look forward to supper time because that's when I tell myself my day is officially over, and I can have my glass of wine with dinner, which makes me sleepy, which causes me to doze off watching TV. Sometimes as early as 8 PM! It's like, 'Oh good, I can finally end this day."

But I must say, it's a miracle that when I wake up the next morning, (in my bed, after getting there somehow during the night) I do feel like it's a new day and I look to see what good thing is going to happen. It's a blessing.
Hugs!

I'm new here and as I have come to find out, night time is not our friend. Those are the hours that I pray, beg, hope for some sense of my husband. And then, like you I think of the wonderful people at DS and usually get up and go to the computer. They have been my lifeline, they give me hope when I feel none. Then I go back and try to at least close my eyes....and as you say, get ready to try to get through another day. But I know the DS family is there to help all of us.

Prayers that your day is as good as it can be.

Sharon

I am with you holland69...i try pm meds, melatonin, that night time is a horrific time for me. my mind wanders so much and i was on that horrible schedule since my husband got sick in 2009 and i was watching over him. I try to be asleep by 10 and sure enough i see 2am always, and some times i never go back to sleep and sometimes i am asleep for what seems like hours only to find out it was 50 minutes and then i am nervous because i need to be up for work by 6am.....and i have done this for so long i do it on weekends except on weekend i go ahead and get up and do laundry or clean even if its 4am...during the week i try forcing myself to sleep which is terrible.

I went through the same thing a few months ago, I was up most the night so I would read and try again. It will get better over time
Just part of that roller coaster ride we are on.

Night time used to be really difficult for me at first. I would just wake up and read, pray, write...because I juust could not get back to sleep. Now, a year after my husband's passing, I have more difficulty on the weekends. I stay really busy during the week, part time work, my grandsons, church service work, the gym, etc. But the weekends seem to drag - I still have some routine activities....but ugh! Sometimes the days just draaaaaaaaaaaaag! I hope this too passes.

I seem to be having the same thing. I'll sleep for an hour and wake up. Lay there for another hour and fall asleep only to repeat it, all over again. I don't like wine but I do self medicate with a couple beers and it seems to help relax me.

You are so right Sharon, the night is not our friend. It seems like now I can't fall asleep until I see it begin to get light. I have started coming into work about six in the evening but this is not the life I want. It has been seven months today since my husband died and I have had trouble sleeping since then. I do hope this passes. I wish you all a good nights sleep...Dawn

Ok here it is at 3:30 am and I am awake again. I sat here just thinking how quiet it was and suddenly it dawned on me. My wife was a very heavy snorer. She would sometimes take a long time between breaths (I think she had sleep apnea but never diagnosed), and when she stopped it would wake me up Didn't happen a lot mainly just when she was very tired, etc. I think that is what is causing me to wake up as often as I am. I going to start playing some white noise or music when I go to bed, maybe that will help. I'll let you know.

I usually put on a load of washing at night. That is the "white noise" of choice. Odd but true for me. I never have been a good sleeper, my 'clock' has always been wrong. Let your mind relive nice memories my friend. That also helps

I am very quickly approaching the 2 yr mark--Steve passed on New Year's Day 2011. I still have trouble sleeping through the night. It's still hard to get to sleep--and I still wake every couple of hours once I do get to sleep--I usually get what feels like my "best" sleep somewhere around 5 in the morning--I have to get up at 6 for work. It seems the sleep problem is one that is common to most of us--somehow sleep just does not come easily for any of us. The evenings, night time, sleeping hours--those are the times that most of us spent with our spouse without fail--so it's just so foreign to be alone during those hours for most of us. I can say that it is easier than it was in the first year--but it's still a problem. Hope it gets easier for you as time goes on. Hugs

Holland69 Im so right with you on this one, my husband passed on Nov 9th, almost a Mo. ago now & since his passing I don't think Ive slept more than 3hours a night, like you I go from the bedroom to the couch to the recliner (my husbands chair) & all his usually involves a period of crying & if im lucky I will finally fall off to sleep about 3 0r 4 in the morning & always with the tv or a light on, im hating the dark these days. Rochelle my nighttime anxieties also started about a year ago when my husbands health really started declining & I was having to get up with him alot night but now since his passing it's gotten alot worse, like Holland said you folks at DS have been my comfort many, many, nights like tonight for example it is 130 am & here I am wide awake & not anticipating sleep for about another 2 hours! I sure hope someday soon I will look forward to bedtime again.