Yes - we used to watch the Dick Clark's NYE show and drink eggnog, and kissed after the ball is dropped. It was a thing of the past now.

i asked jean to marry me at midnight on new years, 1970. she had declined my previous suggestions that we "shack up" we married 30 days later and "shacked up" for 47 years

Rain. It's not the past for me. Still raw, and very much in the present!

Yes, the thought of spending New Year’s Eve without my husband is hitting me like a ton of bricks.

How will you all be spending that night? I think I’ll be home alone with our dog.

Home with my youngest son, and the Shitzu. Hopefully passed out prior to midnight.

I'm sorry Rick. By saying it was a thing of the past, I meant I won't be able to celebrate it with her again, and that made me missed her like heck at moments like this. But this will be the third NYE wihout her now, so yes it's no longer unexplored territory for me.

It's just another thing that sucks. There's nothing I can tell you that can help take that pain away.

This will be my third New Year's Eve without my husband. The first one I spent at my sister's with her and her husband but went to bed before midnight as I could not face it. I cried and just hugged a pillow. My husband's niece called and shared with me that she felt my husband was with me. She gets these feelings and visions often. It made me feel close to him and calmed me. Last year I stayed home alone and went to bed. Again could not face it. I am ok on other holidays, spending it with his family or mine and even enjoying them, but New Years Eve just gets me. I am again going to my sister's for the weekend. There will be other family there including my cousin who is a widow for about 10 weeks more than me. Not sure that I'm brave enough to face it without him yet, this is my biggest hurdle so far. But I do know it will be over and once it's past I'll be ok. That is what I've learned. It will pass and I'll be ok for a bit and then I will get through the next difficult moment. The stretches between them get longer enabling me to live my life. And the waves are not as big and as painful for the most part. I know this all sucks so badly but I wish us all peace in 2018. Marybeth

Thanks Msbklyn and Rain.

My husband and I always went to bed about 10 then said see you next year i'm going to miss that this year. this is my first new year without him

home alone with my dog. again. my third new year without him.

Wow 43 years that's a long time to be happy. I am so sorry for your loss.

Thanks for the reminder I have eggnog in my refrig.

No big plans here. Just try to get through it. I know I will be alone. Hey, does anyone else find that grieving makes you want to throw up? I have been feeling barfy and nauseous for days for apparently no reason. I feel like I am at the worst level right now, after a year has passed. Eggnog definitely does not sound good...

I was widowed 7 weeks before New Year's - Cliff died Veterans Day. That first holiday season was a surreal blur. The first New Year's Eve without him in 30 years was pathetic at best. I watched some lame movie by myself. The first several months my sleep pattern was totally screwed up, so I watched a lot of dumb tv. I stayed away from rom-coms and couldn't face the news or the Times Square ball drop that we used to watch. The kids played computer games in the other room. That's how they coped. It wasn't great, but I and they survived it.

The first holidays are tough, but you will get through them, and it will get a little easier. Don't give up.

Because I live in England now, I will start the New Year a little ahead of you. I hope you get through the night okay and that the new day of the New Year is peaceful for you and you find comfort in 2018.

Love and Big Hugs,
Martha

Thanks cliffskat. Tomorrow will be 8 weeks of pure hell.