Hi nell, I'm so sorry for your loss. It's so fresh and so hard especially this time of year. I'm glad that you found us because here is a place where you can ask anything and vent when you need to.
We get it, as we have all been down this road...some of us much longer than others so continue to read past posts and absorb what you can in these very early days.
My thoughts are with you and hopes for you to find the strength and the courage that you will need to learn how to walk this path. You can do it.
We are all here for each other!
Warm hugs coming your way!
Darcie
PS....btw.... I went back to work early on out of necessity even though I dreaded it.
Looking back on it now, it truly was a big help to be amongst people that cared about me and gave me reason to divert my thoughts if only for a little while.

Lost my wife of 43 yrs. on Nov.6/17 after a 14.5 month battle with colorectal cancer. Sorry for your loss.

Nell, I am glad that you found this group although I am sorry for the reason. Losing my husband and other family members after his death turned my life upside down. I returned to work only a couple weeks after John's passing. It was not easy, but it truly helped. The alternative would have been to be here at home alone, and I am glad that I still worked even though I was eligible for retirement. Until I figure out how I will manage my time and activities in retirement, I will continue to work. Keep coming here for support. We do understand and care. Hugs to you. Roxanne

My husband died October 9th from a cerebral stroke and the ground has been shifting sand ever since. Uncertainty, fear, anxiety, and terrible sadness are my every day emotions. I'm sure the last 4 1/2 years have been a roller coaster ride for you and I feel sad for you and everyone on here. We are a community of grievers but not as people with no hope. I believe as we go through the grief with an openness and surrender to what is our hearts will expand and we will learn that love and grief go hand in hand.....so we learn how to love more, deeper, richer and we take the grief as part of the deal.

Such a tragedy, a life lost too soon. I am so sorry for your loss. Sadly you're not alone. We as widows and widowersee can truly understand the pain unimaginable by others. I lost my husband 10 years ago after a lung cancer diagnosis. The great people here were my life line to get through each day. Visit us as often as you need. Sharon

Welcome Nell. I am so sorry for your loss.
We are all familiar with that sad and lonely feeling. Especially this time of year. I think the biggest value of this group is that everyone TRULY gets it. And those who have passed through the worst of it offer hope to those who follow. And there are those who have found love again like Sharon, Martha, Darcie etc. who show us what is possible, some day.

I used to come here all the time. I have a big mouth. I like the sound of my own typing. And I love feeling connected to others.

That's possibly the most important insight I have gained, I think. We are all connected, we are all in this together, we are all the same, we all hurt, we all despair, we all long for what was, as we try to stumble forward in a foreign life we never would have chose.
Some nights I am hanging on by my fingernails, still. Other days are pretty darn good, but still tinged with that bittersweet flavour that may never go away.
Be kind to yourself. Drink lots of water. Sleep when you can.
Going back to work will be better than you think. ((()))

Hello Nell,

I am truly sorry for your loss. Be patient with yourself, reach out to others, and know that others share your grief and are here to listen as needed.

Hugs,
Lisa

We are walking a different road & are here to walk the road with you:-)
We have experienced the loss of a spouse, mine 4 yrs ago, almost to our 39th anniversary.
Reading how others cope is beneficial, gives an outlook to help us meet the challenges of life.
Some days we accomplish tasks, some days not so much. But, that's ok, all we can do is try.
We learn, we grow, we cope.
We are here for you:-)