My wife of 40 years just passed away 11 days ago of breast cancer and complications of chemo. Needless to say i am devastated. I have never experienced so much pain and loss in my life. I feel guilty for just being left here. I have a great family, my oldest son and his wife and small one lives with me. I think this is helping me very much, but even though they are here I'm feeling a profound loneliness. I know life goes on and I'm trying to take this day by day. My wife and did everything together, I mean everything. We hardly went anywhere on our own. I guess that's why I feel the loss so much.

I'm glad to have found this site. I have read many posts and my heart goes out reading all the same stories I myself have. It's good to have had such a great love as we have had and I need to cling to that. I'm trying. My wife wanted us to start going back to church after many years of not going. She had picked out a church, but became too sick to go. We had her service at this church and I have been going since her death. I feel she is there and I get a felling of peace there.

I know I will see her again, but in the meantime will miss her madly.