Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
Hello, I am new to this site. My husband passed away on 5-21-16 after a 3 year battle with prostate cancer. I cannot describe well enough how this man completed my life. He loved life so much more than I and lived every moment to the fullest. I love this man with all of my being. We had a plan that we would end our lives together, holding hands, but that did not happen. I am finding it harder each day to carry on. I have a brother and sister in law who lost their son, my nephew, to cancer 15 years ago. These two people have been my biggest support team as they are the closest to understanding the pain of loss, however, no one can take away the pain and emptiness I feel every day. I belong to several support groups just to know that I am not alone, however, nothing seems to make me feel whole like my husband did. I miss him so much and I am trying to push forward every day the best I can.
I am just past 2 years of my husbands death and I have my down days, there's no doubt. But what I will say to you is to see your doctor. you are depressed it sounds to me. I was like that too. I have improved last year thanks to my doctor. I just recently saw a counselor. That helped too just to talk about it all.
I miss my hubby every single day. I know you feel the same way. I used to feel how can I go on and it was hurting me. That's when I knew I had to tell my doctor.
Don't go on like this. Sometimes we need help.
Take care.
It has been just over 20 months since Dennis passed suddenly in his sleep, and I found him.
But, I will tell you it does get better, just a new kind of normal..You have to go straight through grieve there are no short cuts..Give yourself the gift of time, I still have sad days, and what I now call surface tear days, because they are always on the surface, waiting to come forward, usually triggered by a memory or smell..But some days now they are tears of laughter, because Dennis had a great sense of humor, and think he sends things to me to make me smile and remember our life together and not feel guilty, because there was nothing I could do to save him..
Guilt, I have found is such a useless emotion, yet we seem to want to torture ourselves with it.
And regret, is another, because we beat ourselves up thinking what about what might have been.
and are powerless to change the out come..
MrsLfromTX...is right, see your doctor, I suffered the worst from anxiety, I finally went, to my doctor when my daughter made me an appointment. and got something to help me..I wish I had gone sooner.I had never taken anything stronger than Advil..I have just lately winged myself off them..
I'm fortunate too have good family support..
Talk to your husband, and ask for signs, I have received many from my skeptic as have my kids..
Dennis, and I often talked about going together or within a short time of each other..but.. Man makes plans and God Laughs..I heard that somewhere, and it is true..for sure..
Take care, peace and hugs...Gail....and come here often...
Don't cry because it's over...smile because it happened..Dr. Seuss..
this site has shown me so many of us experience similar emotions on the death of our loved ones and yet we are all so different. In handling my grief I found counselling to be a great help - telephone sessions, writing in a journal, colouring (amazing how that calms and levels me) and a return to yoga. My man has only been gone a little over three months, and yes I cry every single day, and I will love and miss him forever.
Take courage that with small steps life will go on. Much love K xxx