Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
After reading the nice post about the comments that were written by daughters - it reminded me of one of my first posts quite a while ago -and I decided to post it again.
When I was growing up my father often said, Whenever I feel sorry for myself or wonder why me? I think of Midge.
Midge was my mothers only sister who died at age 85. Midge got married in her early 20s. Her husband joined the army and was killed in a freak accident a few years later. Soon afterwards Midge was confined to a wheelchair due to MS. By her 30s she was legally blind and sometimes was bedridden for months at a time. She lived with my grandmother until she died in 1975 then alone with aides coming into the house until 3 years ago when Midge passed away. It was far from us.
Midge never had the children she wanted, never enjoyed the married life she expected and pretty much saw and end to normal life by the time she was in her early 20s - yet lived another 65 years. She never went on vacations, rarely went to movies and couldnt do the simple things in life like plant flowers in the back yard or paint a picture. She never owned a car, and rarely left the small town she grew up in. Yet she was always happy - never once complaining, appearing sad or asking why me?. She listened to the bible on records and was grateful for what she had been given.
I remember when I was a teenager my father woke up with a terrible headache and blind and was rushed to ER. My father said later, I was thinking all the way to the hospital how lucky I had been to live a good life for 50 years. A lot of people dont get that.(he was ok)
There are times when I think why me? Sometimes (not always) I try to remember Midge and the words my father said when he thought he was dying at 50. It's a hard path we're on - but there are many who never even got to the beginning of the path.
Posted on 04/25/10, 12:36 pm
When I was growing up my father often said, Whenever I feel sorry for myself or wonder why me? I think of Midge.
Midge was my mothers only sister who died at age 85. Midge got married in her early 20s. Her husband joined the army and was killed in a freak accident a few years later. Soon afterwards Midge was confined to a wheelchair due to MS. By her 30s she was legally blind and sometimes was bedridden for months at a time. She lived with my grandmother until she died in 1975 then alone with aides coming into the house until 3 years ago when Midge passed away. It was far from us.
Midge never had the children she wanted, never enjoyed the married life she expected and pretty much saw and end to normal life by the time she was in her early 20s - yet lived another 65 years. She never went on vacations, rarely went to movies and couldnt do the simple things in life like plant flowers in the back yard or paint a picture. She never owned a car, and rarely left the small town she grew up in. Yet she was always happy - never once complaining, appearing sad or asking why me?. She listened to the bible on records and was grateful for what she had been given.
I remember when I was a teenager my father woke up with a terrible headache and blind and was rushed to ER. My father said later, I was thinking all the way to the hospital how lucky I had been to live a good life for 50 years. A lot of people dont get that.(he was ok)
There are times when I think why me? Sometimes (not always) I try to remember Midge and the words my father said when he thought he was dying at 50. It's a hard path we're on - but there are many who never even got to the beginning of the path.
Posted on 04/25/10, 12:36 pm
I love history because it reveals the incredible human spirit.
How our ancestors struggled and prevailed. Inspiring and humbling.
We are right now creating our story. Our part of history.
If our ancestors could do it, we can. And that makes us able to help others along the way..........
:) Till that great reunion with our loved ones :) :)