Hi,
I can absolutely relate. Rich and I always just "knew" we were soulmates. It was something we felt inside and it was wonderful.
I just try not to look too far into the future, I have to continue the "day by day" thing we often hear.
What gets me through most days is feeling and knowing that my darling soulmate is with me always. It's the only place he would want to be! Your soulmate is with you, too!
Take good care with love...Mo

I am at 11 weeks and two days from the loss of my soulmate and, at this point, I don't have any advice as to how to go on. I am just struggling to hold on at this point. It feels as if half of my whole has been amputated sans anesthetic. This is the most intense despair I have ever felt. As to how to respond to someone who tells you how to move on..... don't even bother to try responding! Unless someone has been where you are...they cannot begin, on any level, to understand. I do not believe that every partnership or marriage is a "soulmate" situation, but for those of us that had that type of unique relationship, the going on is very difficult. I can't foresee ever being really happy again...but I do hope for some sort of calm acceptance of Jim's death in the far distant future. Sadly, I can relate to exactly how you are feeling.

It has been 3 years for me also and I think everyone judges me because I am not better. I want to be... I try really hard to be but I am just not. I miss him so much it is all I think about. I wish it would stop I am really tired and sad and I hate living this way.

l can also relate to everything you say.How can you go on when your heart is broken into small pieces,when everything you loved died,the one person who knew how you felt.
If l wake up in the morning,and l am still breathing,l say its another day,do my best with it,l also don,t have a plan for the future.Nothing really bothers me that much any more,other than my kids and family.
l accept l have no control over life and what will happen,so l try not to worry.
l know you are very spiritual,so am l,and this is the one thing that has kept me sane,knowing Frank is still around me,just waiting.
No one has the right to tell you to move on,they have no idea how devastating and soul destroying losing a partner is,and until they have been there,they have no right to pass comment,maybe the understanding will only come for others when they experience this themselves,but l wouldn,t wish it on anybody,but we all have to experience grief sometime in our lives.
take care
Alice

I do understand the "soulmate" thing because that is what my husband and I had for 15 years. Once they are gone, it feels as if there is just nobody left on this earth that you can relate to in quite the same way. I am into year 2 now, and still missing him just as much. I spent so much of my life being lonely, and I realize that many people never have that "soulmate" relationship, and I so grateful for the time we had together. I am currently happy about a lot of things in my life, but I don't really expect to ever reach the stage where I won't miss him. laurabp

I absolutely relate. We were together for 38 years. No, no one will relate to me like my husband did. He was a unique individual, with qualities that caused us to interact beautifully. There are people who believe that they have the magic answer to replace your loss. Nothing will, people. Here me? Did you replace your parents when they passed? OK. Now you get the picture. When I hear move on, I am going to tell that person to move on.

Yes, I can relate, and I hear you. No one lately has told me I need to move on, mainly because I've perfected the wall. Except for those perceptive, lovely people, who see boyond and just hug me or clasp my hand - G-d love them. I'm doing what I need to do, and frequently what I want to do - but through it all, I'm still missing Joe. And still talking to him. As per the comments? I remember thinking, as friends would give me suggestions on what I should do, then talk about their husbands and their plans - I would think to myself, delete every mention of your husband from your conversation, then maybe you'll have an inkling. Sorry, I'm a little pissy today - this just struck a chord. But generally, at 21 months, I'm doing the same as you - trying to find the positive. It happens, it's there. I just wish I didn't have to work so hard to do it! Hugs, Marsha

Soulmate is the only way to discribe Rob. We were perfect complement for eachother. We made eachother the best we could be. He gave me confidence in myself, unconditional love and an appreciation for life through his kind, gentle and persistant way. Rob always said that I motivated him to his better self and that I gave him purpose. We were cherrleaders for eachother, loyal best freinds and we both felt so safe in our relationship. Yes, the grief is so strong, our love was deep too. How blessed but how sad too.
Hug, Donna

Craig always said I was his soulmate, he'd always been looking for me but never thought I might actually exist. His sister admitted she was jealous - she's been married 4 times and has had other relationships as well, but never had that sense of the love of her life or her soulmate. She's the same one who seems to think I should snap out of it and not grieve so much, but I realize she doesn't understand.

Even though Paul and I were only together a year, we both felt like were each others soulmates. We were able to finish each others sentences, knew what the other wanted without speaking and there were alot of other things.
It makes me kinda of mad, when people tell me that I am still young(47) and that it will take sometime, but I will find someone new. I honestly believe that I won't. When God made Paul, he broke the mold.
I feel as if I am just existing. Just about everything that I do I feel like I have to first ask myself, what or how would Paul want me to say or do.

Hi all I am recently widow and it sucks, although he loved me and prepared me the best he could it is so lonely at times I keep doing all the things I am mean't to (whatever that is) and get told everyday how good I am managing . Just to have that aome one who understands you that some one to telk to means a awful lot, so I understand hoe you are feeling

Paula, I'm 42 and I've heard that from alot of people too. Even though it's only been 25 days, I couldn't and won't see myself with anyone else. I've been married twice now and have no intention of EVER doing it again. John and I were soul mates from the get go. My focus now is getting through this, going to finish a master's degree program in addictions counseling, trying like hell to help at least one family so they don't have to go through what I have been through and raising our teen aged daughter. At first, I was afraid to be alone, but then I relaized I'm not alone, John is always with me in spirit and someday we will be reunited. First I have to do what God put me here to do.

I found this in my search for help with losing my soul mate. After a few months of being together but feeling that we knew each other all of our lives I lost David in a roll over accident. We were planning to get married but that dream was shattered on a rainy winter night. With him I was so comfortable and felt so safe. I miss him each and every day but I faltered with people pushing me to move on so I did to satisfy them but I went on to many wreckless years but I knew he was with me always. It has been 25 years now and somehow the memories came rushing back into my life. Yes, life does go on and things will seem to get better but understand that there is absolutely no one that can ever replace your soul mate. I know I tried, because I was in my early 20's when this happened and I didn't want to live a life without love. But after meeting David, sharing what we did, and then losing him it wasn't possible. 25 years later I realized that he could never be replaced and it's time to feel what I should have back then. Don't let anyone push you to move on before you are ready to do so. Always know that your soul mate will always be with you through the years, I know mine has watched over me through the years. I believe that someday God is going to bring us back together once I have accomplished all that God put me on this Earth for. Feel what you need to feel to heal. May God walk with you through these trying times!

Of every insensitive thing people say to me the one thing that actually gets me mad at them is when they tell me i will 'find" love again. Not only do they never stop to consider if I ever want to ever again, ( i simply do not), i have begun to think to myself that what they are really saying is they could love again were they in my place. If thats the case perhaps i should start responding, "oh...you dont love your wife or husband that much? you think if they died you could love again? thats sad because youre just wasting your time while your true soulmate is somewhere out there."
i dont say anythig like that because maybe that isnt fair but thats how they make me feel.
They dont have to love her as much as I do, and they never could, but im growing tired of people thnking I should love her less.

The other day someone asked me if I didn't miss waking up with someone beside me. I sort of half mumbled a" I don't know" kinda reply.Well this morning I woke up looked over to the empty side of the bed and started thinking.I came to the realization it isn't "someone" I miss being there. It's David I miss and if I can't wake up to him I'd rather wake up alone. Actually the thought of someone other than him being there repulsed me. I think maybe it's kinda like the heavy drinkers who always want to push a drink on you. They want you to engage in similar behaviour so they feel better about themselves and the decisions they make.
I sincerely believe any attempt at a new relationship would just make me more aware of the man I had and all I've lost that is irreplacable and I'd miss him even more, if that's possible, and reopen the scars that are just beginning to cover the gaping hole in my heart.