I understand your feelings. I thought about calling Steve's best friend but realized I would be putting undue presure on him. I loved Steve with all my heart and tonight my heart is broken in a million pieces. I miss his so much and cna't find a happy place right now.

It's probably the holidays. They seem to make most of us kind of down in the dumps. At least it's an excuse. Hope you have a better day tomorrow. Sharon

One of those grief waves crashing in. Hope your better..
Sending a hug...Linda

When I am absolutely down in the depths of misery and despair, I don't want to "burden" my friends or family. Someimes I go for a ride and just scream as loud or as long as I want in my car. I talk (or scream) at God, let out everything that is on my mind. I cry a flood of tears, then slowly I get calmed down. when I get home, I am exhausted and spent. But calmed down and ready to get cleaned up, like get a shower and watch a good show or read a good book or the Bible. I find I HAVE to get my feelings out or they will eat me like giant worms. I hate worms. I will scream and stomp them out so they will not be IN ME.

Grief is a force of it's own. It is totally unpredictable and has it's own agenda. We don't get to decide WHEN it will hit us or HOW it will hit us. At times the waves relentlessly pound us. Then we will have moments of calm and stillness.

Hang in there and know that your DS friends listen and care. Hugs, Tami

I am so sorry you are having a very bad evening. This process is like that - a few steps forward and then some back. I hope tomorrow will be a much better day. Hang in there. We understand and care about you.

Sherry

I'am sorry, I know it hurts so badly and no one can relieve it even if they listen they can't feel it. We have no choice but to feel it, the crest of the wave. Hug, Donna

In some small way, I think those moments allow us to share closeness with them however, abstract it might be.Perhaps at those moment's they are thinking of us, as well and that may be why it seems so unescapeable.

Sorry you are feeling so bad, but I totally understand! Sad as it is, it seems we need these times to help us through the grieving process. I know I did, and usually felt better afterward. Hang in there, and hopefully you will feel better in the morning. If not, go find your horse, bury your face in its neck, let his/her winter coat absorb your tears, and take some of your horse's strength into yourself. And come to DS!