I am sorry you are angry and hurting right now. I know wht that feels like...questions around what happened and if it could have been prevented. I am still waiting for answers which I don't think anyone wants to tell me. Blame and knowledge won't bring them back. We must focus on the memories before that moment of pain. The love shared and the journey had together hand in hand. Too often we focus on that day when we feel robbed, broken and lost...the days that follow repeat that day in perpetual sadness...however, it is important to honour the love and life. That cannot be forgotten and needs to be what we hold onto. Not the what ifs or the pain...but the love enduring, blossoming and had. Let that carry you.
If finding out brings you closure then push for answers...just remember this won't change things. I do hope you find peace in your storm knowing the pain we have now is because we truly loved.
Sending you comfort and peace
WR xxx

Closure. A wonderful word. I think I am doing OK but I am still stuck in that one place. That one day and that last moment. It is a hard picture to get out of my mind. I think of books I have read about death. Was she still there watching?
I need to get over the anger. It will take me nowhere. Maybe it is too soon. It has just been 2 weeks.
Thank you for your words.

It is such a hope to hear from others who have been in this situation. I have to wait awhile longer for a death certificate. My questions may never be answered. I believe the nurse that found her unresponsive and called the code has probably thought about what happened that day. I know I would have. I really hope that no one at the hospital caused her death. What an awful situation that would be. I will do what is best.

I am so sorry for your loss. My husband passed away on 9/4/2020 in his sleep next to me. I thought he was snoring but, it was his last breath I heard. He was never sick or even had a cold. It was the first day of our vacation. He had a massive heart attack in his sleep. I am not doing well at all. We were married for almost 6 years and it was a perfect relationship full of love, compassion, trust, laughter, etc. I cry every day and night, I don't eat much. He was 57 years young when he passed. I am at a loss, my husband took care of everything and now I have to try to do it alone. Life isn't fair by any means, I don't know why it happened and I wish I had more time with him. I know he is with me and I have to remember all the loving, good memories we shared. I feel it will never go away for me, just get a bit easier. Being alone and dealing with all of this is not a good place to be but, I'm tryin. I hope you find peace in knowing she is still with you and watching over you and protecting you. God Bless.

So sorry for your loss. Each day is different. Sometimes it seems like a bad dream. Take care of yourself.

My childhood friend's dad was in the hospital for an overnight stay. He'd been on dialysis for months, and was failing, He'd been admitted because he was feeling a little unwell, but there was nothing specific they found. He was made comfortable, and he talked with his family about stopping the dialysis - he'd had enough. He understood stopping would mean he'd die in a few weeks. The family left for the night, and an hour later, when the nurse went to check on him, he'd passed. I asked, wasn't he hooked up to monitors or anything? No, they'd found nothing amiss, he was staying 'for observation.'
Sometimes, things just happen that way.

I still can not get the picture out of my mind. I remember that day very well. Could anything had changed the outcome? I will probably never know. The outcome will never change. I still go on. I do not answer the question “how are you doing” the same anymore.

Sounds so easy but not always so. Everyone is different. Each death is different. Each life is different. I am glad for you that your story has a new ending.