Mandi,
I am so sorry for your loss. All of us here completely understand what you are going through and hope that we can be of help. Please keep coming here and posting whenever you feel the need. Hugs to you. Roxanne

Grieving 101: Drink lots of water to keep yourself from dehydration caused by all the tears. Remember to eat whether you feel like it or not. And do whatever you need to do to get adequate sleep. Try to read all you can from these posts, it will help educate you. Like the saying goes, Misery loves company. Well, you are never alone here because everyone of us have been through most everything you will face, as have those ahead of us helped us. Right now, just focus on doing what you have to do. Everything else will wait until you are ready. This is not about winning the race. It is all about survival. And survive you will. ~~~ Scottie

Oh Roxanne. So very very sorry. I know it's hard. Hardest thing I have and still am having been through. Please hang in there and know there are so many caring and loving people on here who care and been through this too. I thought about moving too. Everything reminds me of what we did together. But if you have family and loved ones near you maybe you should stay. I too want to go but then I think if it would really help to go where you know no one. I don't know. I'm still so confused and sad. But again, please know someone is always here for you. Hugs as tight as I can send to you.

I'm so sorry that you are suffering. We are all able to relate to exactly what you're saying, even though we each grieve a little differently. I remember at two weeks I felt like I was walking through molasses and was completely feeling like it was a nightmare that I would wake up from. Try to do exactly what was suggested above -- drink lots of water, try to breathe deeply (we actually can get exhausted from forgetting to breathe often enough when in the shock of grief). Be very very kind to yourself by giving yourself credit for every single thing you are able to do each day, including brushing your teeth. For me, grief counseling with a counselor in a small group was key to learning tools to express my feelings. Samaritan Hospice has counseling that is very low priced ($40 for eight sessions), and it helped me to begin to start to understand my feelings and begin to express them.

Am so sorry for your loss. We all here are going this new way of life now. I'm waiting for time to pass so I can feel a little more normal. Whatever that is going to be..but at least now after a year I no longer get the tingling in my k ees and stomach as I used to..am trying day by day sometimes second by second. He was my everything for 36 years..still amazing that we are here though. I find d myself doing things he did..maybe I always did and never realized it before..I like that I do though it keeps him closer to my whole being. Hugs

I am sorry for your loss that brings you here - the kind of loss most of us here thought wouldn't happen so soon. But it did. I was where you are now when I joined Daily Strength - simply desperate for somebody to understand what I was going through and help me with the shock of it all. I didn't think I would make it, but being here helped me to survive the unthinkable.

Mandi, you will be okay. It's going to take awhile, but you can get through this. Honest. Don't give up.

People are going to say all sorts of weird shit to you, and lots of it will make you feel worse. So I am going to tell you that you can ignore them. You don't even have to respond to them. As far as moving, just about the first thing some people said to me was "Are you going to sell your house now?" Like I wanted to make my kids move on top of everything else they and we were going through?? Nope! The standard advice is to wait a year before you make any big decisions, if your circumstances allow for that. Don't let anyone bully you into any big changes. You have a right to stay put and grieve and heal. And don't let anyone bully you into giving up your hubby's things, either. People seemingly come out of the woodwork when someone dies. His stuff is your stuff now. Remember that!

Drink extra water, eat at least one decent meal a day, take a multivitamin. Simple stuff but it helps keep your physical strength up, and grieving drains every kind of strength we have, so it's important. Someone here once described our grieving as being like digging ditches for 12 hours a day. I thought that was pretty accurate.....

I am sorry you lost your love and that you need to be here, but glad you found us. Welcome.

Love and Hugs,
Martha, co-Community Leader

Sorry for your loss. What you are going through is normal and part of the process of going through loss and grieving. I'm not sure if you were told to physically move (like from your residence) or if you were told to move on, but whomever told you that is ignorant, and has probably not gone through the loss of their spouse. You will be going through a number of emotions and ups and downs as the days and months go by but you will get to a point in time where happy memories of your husband and your life together will be significantly greater than your sorrows.

So sorry. Only 5 weeks for me, still struggling like mad. I agree though, no big decisions now. Stability best of all

Hi Mandi, I am so very sorry for your loss. I read on another post that you lost your husband to lung cancer. I lost my husband to lung cancer 8 months ago. It's a horrible disease. I am glad you have found this site, although very sorry you had to find it. Welcome to our group.

Sylvia

I'm so sorry. My husband died on April 8th so this grief is recent and raw for both of us.

Beth

I wish I could give you a hug.

So sorry for your loss. Please receive cyber hugs from all of us. My prayers are with you

Know that you are loved and cared about.

Hi- I just lost my husband of 19 years on Thursday & im still numb & in shock. He was in a bad accident last Saturday & was on life support until I said goodbye Thursday night. This is a horrible nightmare & im not sure how I'm going to make it thru day by day.. I have 2 kids that I have to support as well & I feel like I can barely breathe myself... I wish you (& me) a lot of strength to get through this nightmare....

I'm so sorry stillinshock and imissshane. My heart hurts for you two. I had three friends lose their husbands in the same year of each other. I knew then that I had to be prepared-just in case. I have lost a mother and a sister so I know what mourning feels like. May God bless and put His arms around you both and see you through this.