Brave.. I'm so sorry for the loss of you Love...I lost my husband, Dennis 6/14/15 and I know what you are going through as many of us on here do...All I can tell you is you have to go straight through grieve there are no short cuts... and everyone heals at their own pace..Take it one minute at a time...
If you have too see a doctor, It took me until 4 months after Dennis died to so, at the insistence of my daughter...I think anxiety is the worst..Eat a little each day, but drink lots fluids..Take care of you first..There are some good books that helped me also..This is a wonderful site with lots of caring people who are willing to help you..because we all understand what you are are going through come here often...Do you have an employee that you trust who could help you through the business end of your company? I know there's a lot to do when you first lose someone, so don't be afraid to ask for help...It will get better, it will just be a different kind of normal, you'll never stop missing him..Also look for signs from him...I've had many from my skeptic..as have my daughters..
Peace and many hugs...Gail...
The mind replays what the Heart can't delete...

Here is list of books that helped me...

Everlasting Love...Patrick Matthews
Never Say Goodbye..Patrick Matthews
Imagine Heaven...John Burke
The After live of Billy Fingers..Annie Kagan
The Chicken Soup for the Soul books..
Dreams and Premonitions
Touched by An Angel
Miraculous Messages from Heaven..

You can find most of these on Amazon or Barnes and Noble.

Dear Brave
Your story sounds so much like mine. Cancer taking the love of my life in just three short months. We had been married for 41 years. Coming up to 12 weeks now and continuing to wake each day with such sadness and heavy heart and a continuing sense of disbelief.

I found I had to search out support groups. I have great kids and close friends but they didn't really know what I was going through so talking to professional counsellors really helped me, and joining a support group of bereaved spouses.

I know I am moving forward ever so slowly but it can't be rushed. I hope you find the necessary business support and in time healing for your soul. K xxx

I have not been able to go many places,i feel so numb and strange always being alone. My second husband past this past March 2016..sometimes i feel strong and other times not too good. Breathe and try meditation. Go for walks.. You will learn how to do things you never knew you could !!! so that is a sense of accomplishment. Take pride in things you do,even if it is something easy..Gratefulness being grateful for small things..I work on that 24/7. Time is the best healer it is true.Things will start to look familiar again bit by bit..just be easy on yourself and try not to rush..(( Hugs))

You know counseling is only as good as you figuring out what you need and asking for it. Be wise counsel, referrals, help with decision making, accountability, or just a simpathetic ear and encouragement. You get what you ask for. And yes you will learn to do things that you never knew you could before but you also need to surround yourself with people you can trust that will not try to take advantage of you. That's hard when you have to ask for help or perhaps hire someone to take on tasks you are proficient in while you learn or hire someone who could step in and perform those things that need to get done which you feel out of your depth on and would take to long for you to learn which just can not be put off, put on hold or done away with. Just remember you don't have to do things the same way your husband did. We all kind of get stuck thinking what would so and so do in this situation and they are no longer there to ask. Instead ask what you would do if you never had that person to begin with? How would you solve that problem on your own? And that right there maybe the very place you don't want to go because your afraid of loosing it and crying. It's really hard for people in leadership positions to feel comfortable showing emotion because many times it's viewed as a weakness and invites others to take advantage of you. If you catch yourself in that situation you might try what many of us do. Tell yourself out loud if necessary that now is not the time but when you get home or get to the care or wherever your safe place is then you can let it all out, but until such time keep it together. I hope this helps.

PS I used to wait till my staff went to lunch and I would make some excuse to stay behind and work. As soon as they were gone down the hall I would shut my door and cry. I am sure they always knew when I had been crying because my eyes were red and swollen but they never said anything. They just gave me my space. Eventually I was able to share and I ironically had to put them at ease that it was ok to talk openly about it. But when they saw I wasn't falling apart or getting upset, angry etc they knew it was ok to loosen up around me. I was very happy that day. That day I didn't feel like everyone was walking on eggshells around me anymore. That day I just felt like they had finally accepted me as one of them.

So quickly... I am truly sorry. It was 7 months for us.
Then on top of that you own a business. Yes, you would feel like you are spinning....
The responsibilities of 9 employees. Did your husband have someone who was his assistant?

Sometimes it feels like a dream, everything converging all about us..
It all takes time, do NOT give up on yourself
Take care of yourself, food & sleep are essential for you to be able to concentrate & function properly. Little steps... it will come together in time.
Give yourself credit where credit is due: You are getting up, you are dressing, you are concerned about the business. Accentuate the positive.

It has been 3 years for me, I can attest that I function much better. There is the promise of tomorrow each night. The sun will shine, life goes on. There will always be upheavals, obstacles but there also is hope, joy, renewal.

Our life is a changing journey
Blessings
jdp

Hi. I am so very sorry about the loss of your soulmate. I lost my beloved husband of 31 years to cancer five months ago. As for groups, I went to GriefShare from September to December of 2016. It is a faith-based support group and it helped me to improve my relationship with God somewhat. It does make me feel better to have hope that I will see my beloved again someday in Heaven. Other than that, this site has been helpful to me as well. Welcome to the group no one wants to join and I hope you find some peace/hope/strength here.

Sylvia

There are no guidelines for this. Because everyone is different. So it's almost customized for each of us how we get thru. For me my faith has gotten me this far. My wife went back home with the Lord in 2015. August 18th. It does get better but only with time. And it's the travelling thru time that's so hard. First don't think about tomorrow. Today is the only thing you can know exist right now. One day at a time. Something else that really helps is finding those who are and were where you are now in this. Just knowing some one else knows this helps to feel not so alone in it. Just reach out. I haven't had experience with any support groups but may try in the future. Right now the folks here have been so supportive and compassionate that it has helped me get this far also. So keep coming here even if you join a local group. Here folks share what helps and what doesn't. Some are on the path further down than others and some haven't gotten there yet.
Just throwing out ideas. For your business, you might could find a college student majoring in accounting who would appreciate the experience of helping you work out the business end of it. Or may just hire an accountant. Either your going to need the income to support yourself. But take care of you. Do what you need for you to get thru this.
Don't allow anyone to ever tell you it's time to get over it. You don't get over this. You learn to live with it. I didn't understand it at first, but you'll hear the term a new normal. I hated anything that might sound like I was leaving my wife behind but it's how you heal. You will have to reinvent yourself. You want be the same person in a lot of areas. You may wind up learning to be that top notch business lady eventually. And that's what happens. We wind up taking on responsibilities that our spouses used to do for us. And it changes us in many ways. Just keep moving forward everyday.
Please take care of you.
Peace, Tim

Wow. I can't stop crying. All of these comments mean so much to me as it is so comforting from people who are also on the God awful journey that none of us asked for, nor want to be on. My son's friends mother came over this weekend. She's a widow of almost 10 years. We had so much in common to talk about, that it felt good to be with her. But when she left I sat in the floor and just cried. I thought I DON'T WANT TO HAVE THIS IN COMMON WITH HER! I want to be with women who are happily married and love their husbands and their life! I know that doesn't sound very nice. She didn't ask to be on this difficult journey either.
As for the business, I'm trying to see what I can pass over to different team members. I use to be too trusting (I'm southern - haha). My husband was the opposite (from NY -