Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
Today is my birthday, and for me I am feeling so sad. I have done nothing but cry today, as I miss my Gary. I wish he was here to celebrate like he always did on my birthday. I remember last year he took me to a nice steakhouse and we had steak, and to start we had French onion soup. It was so nice, we didn't buy each other presents as going out for dinner was the best present we could give each other. God I miss him so much and today it didn't seem the same. I cried so hard today thi now have a headache and I think my neighbors heard me cry, they must think I am crazy. But you know I don't care. I miss Gary sooooo much that I wish god would say it is my time now and take me so I can be with Gary. The hurt I am feeling is so hurtful. I can't concentrate to do anything today. I never want to celebrate my birthday anymore. I don't want to celebrate nothing anymore.
Why does this hurt so much. It has been six weeks and I still feel the same. I hate feeling this way I really do. Thanks for listening.
It's not just our partner that we lost and grieve, it's a million unnamed things that goes with/because of his/her as well.
Love and Big Hugs,
Martha
skeptic...When I woke up on my birthday, I said OK sweetie here's you chance to let me know if you're around, never dreaming it would...well it did in a big way..Angel..
I was in my front yard changing a sprinkler head I had taken out with my riding lawn mow..
When my youngest daughter pulled in the drive-way, she got out of her car, with a dozen yellow and a dozen red roses...I started to shake so bad and cry, I could hardly get up...She said Mom their just roses, I said no honey they a confirmation. I told about the code her Dad and I had worked out many years before and never told anyone..She said what is strange Mom, is I had a dozen, red and a dozen white in my basket, at Costco, and started for the check-out and for some reason, I turned around and saw the only dozen yellow roses, that were left, and thought to myself, I think Mom, would like those better and went and got them...The thing is Angel, Dennis only bought me roses a couple of times in the 50 years we were married, because we didn't have a lot of money..Till we got older and like you and your husband, we enjoyed a nice meal out, rather than roses..Besides he had planted some in our yard over the years for me..
I've had many signs from Dennis over the last 17 months since he's been gone as have my daughters and one grand daughter, he was close too who he comes too her in dreams much more than me..We have 4 grand daughters and 4 grand sons.
He loved music, all kinds...He liked Forever Young by Rod Stewart, and many times when I'm having a bad day, I'll get my car and it will be playing...I've had other signs also..Angel...
Just take time to be aware...I know all to well about the crying and I even screamed at him a few times for leaving me without warning...He had a wonderful sense of humor, and was a good husband, father and grandfather...He was 70 years old when he passed and was 69...we were married at 19 and they said it wouldn't last...;-)...He wasn't perfect and neither am I, but we were perfect for each other....This site and the wonderful caring people here saved my life and I hope in some way I've helped a few...Peace, Hugs and Prayers...Angel....Gail...
Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened...;-)
You are so new to this sweetie, but time will help, but that's also the hardest thing to get through....time. There's a big holiday season coming up. Sometimes the anticipation leading up to the day is worse than the day itself and sometimes not. Play it by ear, one day at a time and before you know it January will be here. And then what you may ask....well, same story different year.....one day at a time. I know it seems impossible now, but one day you will see peaks of sun starting to shine through. You will pick yourself up off of the floor and start to crawl......then slowly be able to get up on to your knees.....then you will start to stand up and be able to walk once again. You will realize that the sun still shines and the world is still working. You will be able to look back on how far you've come and the progress that you've made. It will surprise you but in a little way make you sad that you were able to go on without him. Don't ever forget though that through the entire process, Gary has always been walking with you, right beside you, guiding you and forever loving you.
I pray for you Dianna.... today and in the days to come for strength, courage and peace.....
Warm hugs my friend.....you are loved
Darcie