Do the things that you enjoy doing. I am walking everyday in nature and taking pictures which I post on FB in the town's page. People seem to enjoy them. It is still hard to find a purpose everyday. I think you need to find what works for you. ((Hugs))

A new career is what help me the most but going out to play cards is what keeps me socializing for a few hours a few times/week. Sometimes a fellow card player or more will meet for a meal before or after cards.

When life was normal,and you felt that way. To be bored like that again !! Now i sit and try to not remember it. My 5 daughters have basically stopped bothering with me now so that's another death too ,make me wonder about karma..still feels like prison a death sentence. I try hard to care about anything and some days i actually do.

You could start small, maybe try going to church/temple/whatever. I go to church at least a couple Sundays a month now. I had to get over being mad at God first, of course. The sermons aren't always great, but I enjoy being around other people and I get to sing with nobody complaining that I'm off-key!

Are you a handcrafter? If you knit, crochet, sew, bead, quilt, etc., there is bound to be a craft group near you. I joined one that meets at the library once a week.

If you're a reader (I am), check with your local library for book groups. That can be a good way to meet people and have interesting conversations.

Sometimes you have to start small, but every small step helps you along a little further. Hope this helps.

Love and Hugs,
Martha

P.S. - Maybe consider getting a pet? A cat to feed and cuddle, a dog to walk and play with, many find it helps to have a furbaby to take care of. My cats were a huge comfort to me.

Beki, the fact that you work full time in a demanding career proves that you are actually functioning at a very high level. Even though you feel depressed. I have been declining by leaps & bounds since husband died. It is frightening. It would probably be best if you started with just 1 small goal per weekend: do one refreshing thing. Not a very challenging activity. Because even attempting THAT will feel monumental to you. Depression & loneliness with widowhood makes every step feel like a mountain. You climb mountains every day, in your career. Defining the “refreshing endeavor” has to be your own choice. Often “other people’s lists” can be overwhelming to read, if you can’t relate to the items. Choose one thing that felt good to you before. Something you did on your own, not with husband. That is less likely to trigger grief., which is a big deterrent. If there is Nothing that you’ve done on your own before, then you may have to consider something new. Small steps.

Thank you for sharing. Yes, it's very difficult to find your place in this world after it's been so well defined for most of your life. It sounds like you're making good choices.
I would encourage you to start making fun dates on the weekends, either with one of your children (or grandchildren if you have them), an old friend (and make new friends), meet for breakfast and a walk through a park, take a day trip to see something you've always wanted to see but never had the time, plan some yard work or some kind of home improvement that you enjoy, read a book in a new place (the park, a coffee shop, etc.), or shopping.
It sounds like you don't need more work---you need a fun distraction for the days you're not working. I would do one or all of those.
I hope that helps!!

Floating......good description. My life was very defined and now, not at all. I said I am exhausted from everything I'm doing (or not) . I am retired - family business, so during the recession I thought it was tacky to have 3 of us and having to lay off people - just didn't seem right. So I was not involved in something I helped start and was active in day to day stuff. Floating - that's really how I feel. My anchor is gone, the kids and grandkids are busy with their lives - I go to games but I'm more of a spectator vs Nana - it's not their fault, they are 21/19/17, they are supposed to wave hi and go off.....but that seemed easier when there was 2 of us watching....rather than one of us floating.
I am so far behind you - I don't have any words of wisdom to share or even to make up - but THANK YOU so much for the description FLOATING - it says so much............
Be well and be kind to yourself