Congrats on your new home!! And yes, YOU CAN DO IT!
We find strength when we are falling apart; we find courage to go on everyday; and after all the other things we have gone through, owning a home is a rewarding piece of cake. He would be very proud of you.
Cathy

CONGRATS on your new home!!!!

It is both exciting, and nerve wracking at the same time isn't it? First, your honey is watching, and is SO PROUD of you!!! WAY TO GO is going through all those clouds up there as we speak!

I have maintained my home here for about 9 years now. I was divorced before I met G and went through most of the feelings you are having now. My first husband got up and left one day, and I had no money, and no clue about how to do this or that. Kids to raise, and a mom at the time to take care of. Had NO CLUE what to do!!! But little by little you learn as you go. Now I can take care of, and know what to do in just about any situation. Even when I married G I still took care of all the bills, and the stuff in the house.

YOU CAN DO THIS!!!! and any help you need, advice, there are many here including me that can help! Except with the sump pump! lol I don't have a basement! lol

SO HAPPY for you, and know when you cross that threshold, he'll be right there with you, CHEERING YOU ON!!!

HUGS and congrats Diane

Oh yes, this widow was left with a house that was 100% maintained by her handyman hubby, and boy have I come a long way from my old panicked self. I can now confidently say that I know how to handle anything that comes my way. Here it goes:

I've learned the hard way not to make a mountain out of a mole hill- try a simple, common sense solution first- example: DIY youtube videos helped me rehang a pain in the neck sliding screen door in a snap.

I have American Home Shield- it's insurance for managing major repairs in your home. You pay a monthly fee or prepay for the year and if something big, like the furnace goes, you call, they come, and they cover the bulk of it, minus a service fee. This is my lifeline and I've used it many times. I had my entire central air conditioning replaced for $60 no questions asked. It covers plumbing, heating, appliances, electrical, and more.

Go to Lowes or Home Depot and ask them anything. I've taken in nuts and bolts and asked what tool do I need to fix a daybed. They taught me how to patch a hole in the drywall. It's just really nice to talk to friendly people who are willing to give free advice. They have Saturday workshops too.

We have a subgroup right on this site called Helpline for Widowers/Widowers. It was created by plumber Dan, one of our own groupmembers, and we do our best to help each other with home maintenance.

When all else fails, I ask for help from my network- daughters, neighbors, colleagues, even my 4-year-old grandson helped me carry pellets for the stove; and if I can't find anyone- I get references from these same people and call businesses. If I have to pay for repairs myself, I don't stress, I just suck it up and move on. My Mike would say there's no point in worrying about things you can't control, and I'm learning to take this to heart.

All of this probably sounds overwheming, but you'll be amazed how empowering it is when you figure out even one thing! You can do this! Congrats on your new house Truhal!

It seems like each day I stumble upon something to do in maintaining this house, that's why I'm looking for a condo or a smaller house to downsize. I also stumble upons things my husband was suppose to fix but never quite got round to it..these are my only moments of anger. You need to find yourself a good handyman to be able to call upon when it isn't something you can handle. Don't wait until you are in dire need because then you will end up with someone you don't know and it will co$t you.
Congratulations, there is nothing like having a home of your own...regardless!!!!

Congratulations on you new house. If this is what you want you can do it. If you are mechanically inclined then you can find information and how to video's online. If, like me, you are a mechanical disaster then you need to build a reliable team. I have long, loyal relationships with my oil/furnace company, my landscaper/plower, my exterminator and my car mechanic. My nephew who lives with me is a godsend. He takes good care of me, the animals and the house. He is not my husband but he learned a lot from my husband. I also trade favors with my friends. I'm good at paperwork and they are good at house stuff.

The best advice I can give you is check references, get referral's from from friends and get to know your neighbors.

Best wishes on continued happiness in your new home.

Grace

Hi,

Congratulations on your new house and home. I find it challenging, but doable. It is good to network, ask people at church or other friends what they do, etc. You will manage. :-)

Shar

I have stayed right here in my home since Jim died here. The maintenance is sometimes scary but I have my human angel Joe next door and he helps me so much. Mostly now it's waiting for the refinancing to come through and I am slowly going through Jim's tools and stuff. The basement may never be empty. I am as happy as I can be here with my two bassets. Can I hear from someone about this American Shield???? Hugs

Maintaining a home is a huge responsibilty and can be a headache at times, but I think it is doable. If you are young enough and healthy, you may be able to do a lot of things yourself or learn how to do them.

For things you cannot do or for jobs needing to be contracted-- be very careful and deal only with reputable people. Never pay for work before it is completed other than $$ for materials. (deposit) If I were you, and if you live in a colder climate, make certain your furnace has been serviced or filters changed--ready for the winter.

Best of luck to you! You will do just fine.

Hi Truhal...I will be staying in the home that Mike and I built 24 years ago. I have already managed to redo the bathroom, kitchen and build an outdoor memorial garden...when I need help, I call one of Mike's best friends (he is a contractor and fixes anything I need fixed...and yes, I do pay him)....also my BIL built his house, so he really knows what to do...
I cut my own lawn...good exercise...and since I work at a career and technical high school, I have all kinds of reliable experts to help if/when I need it. I agree with building yourself a network of support from friends who will be there to help out...
Also one of the men at my church...he's the guy who knows where to get anything and how to do just about anything...I know I can call on him if need be. I am blessed to have so much support.
And then again, I'm not afraid to get my hands dirty and try to tackle a project myself...as long as it isn't too heavy!!!
Congrats on the home! You will be fine! hugs, Jill

I also found myself alone in a four bedroom house without my very efficient husband who could fix anything, maintain anything. I knew absolutely nothing about anything mechanical--and know little more now. I am lucky enough to have one son who is just like his dad, can fix just about anything---but he's so busy with a family and two jobs--and another son who isn't mechanical in the least but us perfectly willing and able to keep the lawns mowed and things weedeated (as long as his brother maintains the tools lol). That being said, I'm right at 10 months in, not quite past the first year and have come to the conclusion that I will have no choice but to learn to do a lot of things myself to be fair to the rest of my family. I've found inspiration in a unlikely place--a friend/co-worker who is just one of those ladies who believes she can do just about anything if she sets her mind to it. She's married to a local physician who has little time for or interest in repairing or maintaning things--if it were up to him they would just hire it done--but she sees no reason to pay someone to fix something she can fix herself---so if she can't figure it out on her own she googles it---prints up the directions and off she goes---she has retiled the kitchens and baths in her rent houses---laid carpet--repaired plumbing and lights---she even took the whole front of her SUV apart to replace something in the headlight compartment of the vehicle---she googled it, found out she had to take the whole top section out to even get to the bottom compartment--but she printed it out---then did it step by step--even took the other side apart and replaced that one too just to prove she could do it--and it was 10 o'clock at night when she started that project. She tells me I can do just about anything if I just make up my mind I can do it---just google it for instructions, print them out and get to it---she says I can always call her if I get in a bind. She has amassed quite an array of tools doing all that stuff so she says she will probably have whatever I need to get it done whatever it is. So, I've made up my mind to at least try to fix some things myself---I know I have the ability---I just have to set my mind to be industrious enough to seek out the information and try to put it in play.
Good luck to you--I know we can all do things we never thought we could---there are so many ladies here on this sight who have made it through one, two, three years or more and have become quite self-sufficient--they are our inspirations.

Congratulations on your new home! You can do it! So many of us were in your shoes,too, and have learned how to handle or deal with house problems. I learned to use the riding mower, a jig saw, a tree saw, and simple tools - hammer, nails, screw drivers and screws, caulk, simple plumbing (stopped up pipes), air pump to pump up tires, battery charger for the lawn mower, and on and on. Take advantage of those half day courses at Lowe's and Home Depot. Have some resource people you know (neighbors, church friends, family) handy. The most risky thing to do, I found out the hard way, is to pick somebody out of the yellow pages without knowing a thing about them. You can do it!!!
Congratulations, again,
Kathleen

Here's the American Home Shield website Cleodoggie. http://www.ahs.com/homeowners/
There's other home insurances around too, so it's good to shop around. Our local utility company offers one too.

You can do it! Ask for help, and go for Youtubes!

Congratulations on your new home!!

You are a member of the most adaptable and resourceful species on earth - WOMAN. Don't worry, you'll be able to take care of your home without a problem. It can be scary at times but not impossible. Your husband will be there to help you. I had a leaky faucet and everyone who came by mentioned it to me and offered to install a new one when I got one. Needless to say, that was the last thing on my mind, and one day I stood in front of the sink and in tears I said, " You see, there is no one to help me take care of things like this -- Why did you have to leave without fixing the faucet?" To make a long story short, the faucet is no longer leaking and I did not fix it -- I had another problem with a side door -- my neighbor was walking by an saw my garage door open and poked his head in to say hello, I told him what I was trying to do and he took a look and in 5 minutes fixed my problem. I know my husband is helping me. He's not far away and is with me when I need him. Enjoy your new home and ask your husband for help when you need a little guidance. Hugs! Connie

I like Lovesjoe's answer. Your dear hubby will be there - just ask him for advice and listen for the answer. It works most of the time.

Well, congrats on the new home! I'm doing the opposite - just moving out of our home and into a condo.

In the years that my dear hubby was sick, I learned about fixing the sump pump, humidifier on the furnace and lots of other minor repairs. You will be fine. All the others have given excellent advice. And I heartily agree with the "google" advice and the "Youtube" advice. You can find anything on the web.
Hugs