It is a horrible scary place to be. I had some outstanding bills from my husband, I found the agencies were willing to make payment plans with me w/out any hassle. Also go on line and check the consumer laws in your state so you will know what your rights are. In my state they cannot call you after specific hours, use abusive language or otherwise harass you. A good agency wants their money and will work with you not against you to get it - after all more bees with honey and all that. It's a horrible reminder of all we've been through, I agree. Deep breaths and keep coming here to vent when it gets too much.

Bailey: The hospital should have a social worker who might be able to open some doors for you. Have you ever heard Clark Howard on the radio in your travels? He is a consumer advocate and is really dynamite, I used to listen to him on the road all the time. He is constantly telling stories about how collection agencies are willing to take 75-cents-on-the-dollar just to get something, because that's better than nothing at all. Check out his website, you can just google his name. Dave Ramsey is another one, and he's Christian-based. I hope that helps...and we will certainly pray for a resolution to come your way.
Good Luck and Much Love...DS

Hi Bailiey, First take a deep breath and hear me when I say to you, It will be okay. Ask yourself, What's the worst thing that could happen? It already did -- he's dead. Everything else pales in comparison. You say he had no insurance. I don't know his age, but most over age 65 have at least medicare, and some have a supplement. I just want to be sure that your husband did not have your husband have medicare and no supplement.. As you consider the advice of others, consider talking to a bankruptcy attorney about your options. I spent over 20 years doing bankruptcy law and served 9 years as a trustee. Those laws are designed to help you. In this part of the country, initial consultations are free (at least used to be). The attorney should be able to tell you what you are at risk of losing (most people hang onto to everything) and you should be able to discharge all your medical bills. It is possible that you might not be legally obligated to pay his medical bills -- that is another question a local bankruptcy attorney should be able to answer. I know you've always paid your bills -- but now is different. If it helps you, know that the concept of bankruptcy originates in the Bible -- under Mosaic law it was called the year of release every seven years. Sometimes, it is very necessary. And don't let the debt collectors fool you, as far as I know, they first will have to bring a lawsuit against you and get a judgment before they can start garnishment or attachment procedures. If whatever other advice from the group doesn't work for you, please go see a local bankruptcy attorney and see what your options might be. And keep taking those deep breaths. It really will be okay. Your friend ~~ Scottie

I put everything in my Attorney's hands and it left me stress freeThere are a lot of laws that will protect you,,,you should absolutely not handle it yourself.

Here in the state of oklahoma. Any medical or credit card bills, that are in his/her name only, are not your obigation. I was able to get out of even his death bills, of ambulance etc, and his credit card bills, that only had his name on it. You must initiate a letter, stating due to your name not being on the bill or contract that you did not agree to or sign, you are not obligated to pay his bill, as he was a legal adult, and therefore since he is now passed, you are not liable. Also send them a copy of the death certificate. Each state can be different. Had a close friend whose an attorney tell me this plus the office manager of the funeral home, who had lost 3 husbands. Just FYI.. hope you get answers quickly. Much love and hugs carla

Thank you all for the advice and support. It's a bit better tonight. Our daughter came after work and reviewed all the medical bills and organized them. We sort of developed a plan. It's still scary and I have to keep reminding myself to quit clenching my muscles and breathe, but I cam see a glimmer of light. I am going to drag out my adult coloring book and totally escape a while. {{{Hugs}}} ~ Bailey ~

I was thinking, Bankruptcy, It sounds bad, but sometimes its a relief. Once you get it started, the collectors can't even call you, if they do, the judge can offer them to pay you a settlement for it. Just do it on the medical, you can file exempt on things you want to keep. ie, home, car... sandee

God bless you, Bailey. You received some good advice. I'm sure this can be worked out.

I've heard that you're not responsible for your husband's medical bills after they pass. You let them know the person is deceased. Please find someone to consult with to find out. It's possible you may not owe a penny.
Take Care,
Lori

I simply told these folks my wife had passed on and we had no life insurance. They asked for proof of her death (like I was going to lie about that), and so I began sending out copies of the death certificate. They charged off her debts because I told them my money was going for her funeral and household expenses. You can only do what you can do.
Peace, Tim

Dont let these "collection wolves" scare you, its their job to be aggressive, unfeeling animals. (I didnt want to swear here)
I am Canadian, but I do believe both our laws (Canadian and US) have many protection mechanisms for helping you.
I agee with "Scottio", you should discuss ALL your options with a qualified bankrupty lawyer, They will know all the angles and approaches available, and the "liability" laws that can be leveraged in your favour. Per some of the other U.S. based DS members, you may have state laws that are already protecting you.
Ignore their calls until you have an approach or solution, They cant do a thing without going to court and they really dont want to go down that road anymore than you do.
You will make it through this!

Hi Gang, I want to update on this post. First, THANK YOU ALL for the support and advice. It grounded me and gave me courage to face it directly. Two of the three letters of collections were discharged after I spoke with them. The remaining big one is pending after the review my application for financial relief. What a blessing and relief. You all being " at my side" gave me the courage to do what I needed to do. Huge happy hugs to everyone. {{{}}} ~ Bailey ~

Bailey...Congrats on the discharge of the first two letters...some people might say I'm crazy for saying this, but that's OK, I'm an expert at it...but it sounds to me like you have friends-in-high-places...VERY high
places! It just gets me all warm-and-fuzzy when the little guy wins!. Now I gotta do my McDonalds dance, because I'm-lovin-it-lovin-it.

Hi Gang, I want to update on this post. First, THANK YOU ALL for the support and advice. It grounded me and gave me courage to face it directly. Two of the three letters of collections were discharged after I spoke with them. The remaining big one is pending after the review my application for financial relief. What a blessing and relief. You all being " at my side" gave me the courage to do what I needed to do. Huge happy hugs to everyone. {{{}}} ~ Bailey ~

I'm so sorry to hear of your financial difficulties. This isn't unusual after the death of a spouse, especially if they were the so-called bread winner or biggest earner.

Is it impossible to declare bankruptcy? You sound like a moral person, but bankruptcy isn't necessarily immoral. I think bankruptcy laws were created especially for people like you. So long as you've done everything possible to honor those debts, there's nothing wrong with writing them off.

The alternative, of course, would be to continue to talk to the collection agencies and try to work out some sort of payment plan.