Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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krysshaddow 10/16/2013

So yesterday I hit 10 months. And it's weird how just becuse my brain pin points it as another marker in time you feel it everywhere. I even felt it coming a few days before. Not like any other day is less painful, but each month on the day it's like I'm not even myself... I mean I haven't felt like myself since I lost him, but the past few days I'm not even what's left of myself. I've been snapping at my family and spacing out and feeling like just getting away, all by myself and not telling anybody where I'm going not answering my phone. I swear if I wasn't so worried about taking care of my mom or losing my job I wouldn't even think twice about it. I feel like a little kid wanting to run away from home. Not like that fixes anything.
Anyway, I don't watch Glee but when I heard about Cory Monteiths death this summer for some reason it struck a nerve. Maybe because he was 31 like Wayne was? Or maybe because I know first hand how horrible it was for his girlfriend. Anyway, I couldn't help but be curious about the memorial episode. It was really good, and so familiar. The song choice was beautiful, but really hit hard cause the very first song was a song Wayne Loved! It was so weird. It was so emotional and just too close to reality.
I guess I just needed to get that off my chest.

deleted_user 10/16/2013

My thoughts are with you. I am over a year now, and I can remember that time clearly. I think somewhere in that 8-10 months we feel trapped in ourselves. I know with myself that I had not slowed down till that 8 month mark and it really hit me hard. Thank God I found this website to read what others are going through and to vent when needed. Even now I still have my moments to where like you I would just like to run away. But in reality I know that cannot happen. This journey is not easy and so many things come up as reminders. When this happens I try and think of happy memories to get me through. God Bless Susan

chilipepper328 10/16/2013

I'm sorry I dont have any encouraging words for you. I just wanted to let you know I relate to your feelings and you are not alone in this. Vent away as much as you need to. Xo

onebrokenheart 10/16/2013

I am at 8 months and like you every month on the day I react. I have a physical reaction even if my first conscious thoughts of the morning are about something else. Then I am thinking why do I feel physically sick? Then it hits me...oh, yeah, its THAT day. I try to take it as easy as possible and take care of myself. This month I forced myself out of the house and went to a U pick apple orchard. I ended up feeling better, the day was beautiful, the air clean and those apples so yummy. Just as I returned home the song unchained melody was playing on the radio. One of our favorites. I just sat in the car and cried.

jewells1 10/16/2013

For me, it was "23rd" itis. A week or two before, then a few days after...the high wave of fear and anxiety, of what the day is. A remembrance of the 23rd when I lost John, replayed. Now at 17 months finally down to just a 3-4 day swell.

Not yet over it, but not drowning those days, I can tread water.

Gentle hugs, let us be your water wings.

kynessie 10/16/2013

I watched that episode of Glee too and I'm at almost three years and I cried all the way through it. I thought it was done very tastefully. I saw a news piece on that episode and everything was done on the first take and the emotions they caught on camera were sincere.

Nessie from KY

jewells1 10/16/2013

I am a glee fan, I missed the episode. I hope I can find a replay.

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