I can't speak for everyone, but i imagine its pretty safe to say we all have or are experiencing the same thing. I know i do for a fact.

Lost my wife in Nov. 2014 so we are about 1 month apart timing-wise..For sleep, I started to make sure i was listening to music, or i would put on a youtube "meditation" video and just listen to it until I could fall asleep..the lack of sleep alone is going to exacerbate the other stressing items.

Hang in there

Grieving just takes the life right out of you....I cannot remember things, have to look at a calendar to know what day it is......

Is your son receiving any help/counseling at school to help him?

Just know you are not alone with these feelings.

Hugs
Jen

LMJ90

You are not alone. I thought I was doing so much better, I was starting to feel more like myself, at least I was able to fool alot of people, but lately, everything is coming crashing back down.

I am feeling like you describe, just feel like staying in bed and hiding, have no energy, constantly confused over simple things like what day it is.

I thought it was just because the bigger days are coming, my birthday, our 25th wedding anniversary, our daughters wedding, I am trying to deal with it the best I can.

Just know you are not alone in these feelings.

In the beginning, and thank God for this; I was taking care of everything and everybody. I was so together and so helpful and planned and persistent and getting things done! Now, OMG, I forget what I'm doing, I forget where I'm going and why I was going there!

I'm not even questioning if this is a common occurrence or not......I just can't/won't/don't want to do anything about it. I've completely changed my address book [when it comes to folks who either didn't show concern for me or Morey] or, made some ridiculous comment which only served themselves and not me!

I'm living someone else's life. I don't know this person, although she looks like me in the mirror.......I don't know her!

I'm giving myself time, love and kindness. I'm praying that this life sucking grief will turn on it's own ugly head and allow me to come through again.

I love you guys,
Roz

I hate to burst your bubble. I am at 29 months, and you described my feelings lately. I was doing so well. That 50th Anniversary really set me back. I am depressed, my insurance don't cover that. Hang in there, there will be times it will get too you. I am so sorry. Sandee

Lisa . . all that you have described is so very "normal" in grief. It totally doesn't make sense to our former selves, as we knew us, but grief has it's way of changing us. Sleepless nights, not knowing which day it is, lack of energy, feeling sad/depressed, tired . . . yup, just a few of the descriptives of grief. Take a deep breath and know you are not alone, nor are you by any means a complainer. It's all so very hard. One day bleeds into the next and the next . . sometimes without an end in sight. However, I can assure you this will get better and ease up with time. I always remind myself, it didn't come to stay, it came to pass. All of our timelines are different, so I can't say when, or how many more days need to pass for you to begin to see the light once again. Oy vey. And you have a move on top of this? That's stressful in and of itself. One of the top five stressors. So sorry you are feeling overwhelmed. Please be gentle with self, don't expect too much right now and really try not to compare your grief timeline with others. We move and heal at our own pace. I'll be thinking of you and your upcoming changes with the move. Hugs, D

Bless your heart! Moving in itself is very stressful even if you weren't grieving!! Add grieving to the mix and you really have a lot to deal with!! hang in there. Like I tell my seniors that I care for, just do the next thing!! Don't get ahead of yourself. Don't worry about how you will handle tomorrow. Give it to God to care for. And trust Him. That's how I've got thru.. I miss my Bob so badly sometimes I feel like I just can't do "being a widow any more".!! But I keep moving forward You are in my prayers.

Hearing you loud and clear. I feel at 9 months of losing my husband (on the 16th) that i wouldn't expect much difference and i am right.
But i feel like i am going through another stage of grief. I have things I can do but don't feel like doing them. I do the normal laundry, mopping, feeding animals, etc,. but like clearing up the office, i say maybe tomorrow. I feel tired like a heaviness inside of me.
So i chalk it up to depression and the pain of loss which hits me every single morning. Now i think i am getting into an angry phase of grief.
I think back to what should've been said or done but i also know that it is too late for that so i try not to go there. But it's hard to control your thoughts, images and sadness.
So being forgetful is right up there with all the rest. I write notes to myself on my computer to remember to pay certain bills on certain days etc. Refill meds etc.
So it's a scrambled life right now with what to do first and how important is it to do at this time.
All we can do is try to adjust and that's about it. Do what makes you feel happiest and comforts you.
I hope you and our son better days ahead.

I can't imagine the stress of moving on top of trying to grieve! There should be a law! lol I too have a hard time keeping track of well basically anything. Phone, day of the week, time of day, fell asleep on the couch last night and when I woke up I didn't know if it was 8:30 at night or day. Drive right by places I meant to go. Get somewhere and forget what I came for. You name it. I've done it, or "not" done it. I think it is all of the above, grief, moving, son, lack of sleep, and our favorite STRESS! Hang in there, if this is a wave just let it pass. Hugs to you, Michele

Lisa Im so sorry you have to deal with a move right now...I really hope you have someone to help you...I have felt like you described many times with out having to pack up.....since we cant stop the move I hope you find the strength to just put your stuff in boxes...no need to get rid of anything now..leave two boxes for last with what you must have when you get where you are going so you can live out of those two boxes and get some rest...please keep us posted

oh my god, I feel like I wrote this post!! I lost my husband of 20 years on 5/8/15.... three weeks later my 2 teenagers went abroad for the summer (pre-planned but really crappy timing) and a week after that my landlord told me he was putting our house up for sale, and I needed to move! I begged and begged (resentful at having to do so) and got a few extra months.

The pain is overwhelming sometimes. The task list is overwhelming at ALL times. I would rather zone out and feel nothing than feel what I am feeling right now. How about if you and I make a pact to each do one thing every day to help us in whatever-our-new-life/home is going to be? Because I have to find a place to live. I have to pack up my husband's things, I have to pack up my things, my teenagers' things, clean/sort/donate/throw away. At a time when I just want SOMETHING to be the way that it was. Why does everything have to change at once? It's too much. Maybe if we help each other, we can chip away at it. Tomorrow is Tuesday, according to the calendar. I am going to return the phone call from the landlord whose house I may be interested in renting, and I am going to do 2 loads of laundry so that I get some movement around the house and perhaps some clean sheets on the bed.

I have no children but I can relate to the feeling over being overwhelmed. Only I seem to oscillate between attempting to move forward and then crashing to the bottom with the lack of energy/focus and annoyance at just about everyone and everything. It is exhausting, I still want the world to stop and give me a change not just to catch up but to heal.

Have you found another place to live? Might be exciting to look at places?

LM, It is part of grieving and I have gone through the same lack of energy and wanting to hide in my bed or more likely my chair. It's normal for every day life to bring feelings of being overwhelmed. Add having to move on top of everything is enormous. Use those times of no energy to release your emotions. I would cry and write letter in a notebook for privacy and pour my heart out. I can look back at them now and see how I progressed. I also came to the point that I realized that I couldn't do this alone. I talked to my doctor and he prescribed medication and referred me to a therapist that was suitable for me. Talking to him helped greatly. There were times of overwhelming sadness, but I also had breakthroughs of how to handle my feelings. I wish you well and sending you a gentle hug. Sharon

Thank you everyone, it sure seems like I am crazy sometimes but as I can see Im not alone and that helps tremendously. I can see that others have these same feelings and that its ok to be open about them. I have always been the fixer not the one that needed help so this is one of the very new and harsh feelings for me. I don't have a support system where I live and there are no support groups so I am dependent on myself and thats so scary. I do talk to my kids but this is all new to them too so its a learning experience we never wanted to learn. Bethlyn I would be glad to make a pact. Today is Wednesday and I am going to pack up my pantry and make some calls. Thats about all I can do today. I haven't even started to think about packing my husbands things