Can we just get rid of all Holidays and reminders already? Sigh. I totally agree! Not easy . . . however, you are right, tomorrow is def a new day (if not a beter day)!! Heads and chins up . . we do survive! Hugs, D

Tomorrow is a new day. I worked today so that helped. I also took some probable cause for some truly horrific child abuse charges which definitely changes my thought process about the tragedy of my life. I end up thinking, at least I have had people that loved and cared for me. What chance does a child stand when he or she is treated like a worthless piece of trash by his or her parent instead of their most precious gift? Not preaching, just it really changes your perspective and makes you realize that love is worth it and is the only thing of real value that we offer to the world.

Chin up and hugs,
Val

Hugs. I get that too on these days. John usually worked extra hours before any holiday, so when he finally could get the time off we did so much to try to fit it all in the short window of days. My garden would be turned if it was not yet done, plants planted for his salsa my clipping garden. New color in the flower beds...visiting or having a cook out even if it was just for us and neighbors. Catch up times with friends. So many are now with him, even looking at pictures of others celebrating hurts. Memorial day (30th) is also the birthday of my baby brother, he left this world in 2000, so I try to touch base with my much loved sister-in-law. So many of the family that still have their spouses forget to call either of us. And none understand that the parades and fireworks don't feel good when you can't just reach out and grab the hand of your spouse while you marvel at the colors together.

Now the minutes and hours are so long. I try to rest, but get itchy about all the things we could do together, but I can't do alone. Kinda wish there was a way to wave a wand so all of us here could bbq together. I have been lucky enough to meet virtually some great people here, but..well you know.

Now I am between classes and just barely keeping the lawn from getting so long that I don't get a ticket. Wondering if I can get through the summer classes...when I really want to go lay in the sand and be swept out with the tide.

I am sorry this isn't much help but it is what's real on days like this. I hope tomorrow will be better, but just at this moment....3 years seems very short for me.

So maybe we can set the table and share what we would do as a group if we could meet and take over a beach...Maybe a late night bbq ribs, chicken with some roasted corn, s'mores or apple pie ala' mode? Talk of what we know of love we experienced? We all have those funny quirky moments that still curl the corners of our mouth. The stories, memories that those that have them everyday do not know the value of.

Hugs of support and friendship.
Jewells

Well. I made it through a Holiday. My son invited me over to cook out with his family, my daughter and her family, and a few friends. It was so nice to be celebrating with others. And, oh my, My Birthday Party!!!...Tomorrow is my birthday, we have always had it on Memorial Day, as no one has to work on that day. They rolled it all together. All the kids (and a few adults) swam in his pool, It was COLD...LOL All in all a good day for me... Sandee

I was "weepy" tonight, too. Darn holidays! ... brings up memories of much happier years.

Sandee, glad you had a nice birthday party!!!

np, I was as well. I kept thinking about Ben would be grilling ribs and we would be watching the laying of the wreath at Arlington.....just so many memories.

Yes, if we could just forget about the holidays.....but that is not going to happen. They come and they are painful.....they just keep coming.

I have NEVER had another love but Morey......He was my first love and we had such an affair going for over 40 years......How lucky was I? And, I still feel sorry for me!!!

I'm going to wallow in my self-pity......see ya!!!!

Roz

Feeling sorry for yourself can be beneficial in its own way and time. Its nothing to beat yourself up for. And sometimes for some periods we need it. Hang in there Hugs

I know this was from a couple days ago, but it fits me perfectly. I've been weepy for a couple days and today is no better. I just feel I have so much on my shoulders I can't breathe or get it together. Sharon

Big AZ hug coming to you Sharon. I know you are very worried about your husband's surgery coming up and I wish we could all be there to give you support in person. However, being there in spirit will have to do I guess. Good thoughts for both of you. Darlene

I too have been hosting pity parties for one lately. More than I should admit. May was a hard month with my birthday, our anniversary, my stepsons birthday and Memorial Day. Too many holidays in one 31 day period. June should be easier. I slid through my birthday refusing to even acknowledge it was my birthday. I also slid through our anniversary refusing to do anything to bring attention to it, then finally decided since he wasn't here I wasn't married so therefore it wasn't an anniversary. Worked for me. It rained Memorial Day which fit my mood perfectly. Some days I just need a pity party.