Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
For those of you that are unfortunately at the beginning of this journey, and for those having a difficult day, or time, I want to tell you that you will have better days and times ahead, and please just hang on in there.
I read a book last week for young widows, a book that I read and almost threw out in the early days when I bought it. Something about my read has made me realise that Ric wouldn't want me to be miserable, to be sitting thinking I can't achieve anything, that my life has ended. Because it hasn't. I truly loved him, he was my world, my soulmate, we always stuck by each other no matter what. Ric loved change, new things, new gadgets, moving jobs, always looking for what was next; I was the opposite, and through him I got to be where I am today. So, I'm not going to get stuck in a rut, think I can't do things when I can, and I'm going to live his legacy.
I've managed to get two job interviews for next week, I'm on my last assignment for my course, and our five year old came home with a SUPERSTAR award from school today. I will live on, there are better days to be had, and I don't like the term "moving on", I am adjusting to this life. I've still an employment tribunal to fight, but Rics spirit lives on in me, and I will do it.
I have had really bad days, and still do, but not as many, but for those of you that are in the long dark tunnel, I guess I'm trying to shine some light.
Hugs to you all, and I wouldn't have got to where I am today, without you lovely understanding people x
I read a book last week for young widows, a book that I read and almost threw out in the early days when I bought it. Something about my read has made me realise that Ric wouldn't want me to be miserable, to be sitting thinking I can't achieve anything, that my life has ended. Because it hasn't. I truly loved him, he was my world, my soulmate, we always stuck by each other no matter what. Ric loved change, new things, new gadgets, moving jobs, always looking for what was next; I was the opposite, and through him I got to be where I am today. So, I'm not going to get stuck in a rut, think I can't do things when I can, and I'm going to live his legacy.
I've managed to get two job interviews for next week, I'm on my last assignment for my course, and our five year old came home with a SUPERSTAR award from school today. I will live on, there are better days to be had, and I don't like the term "moving on", I am adjusting to this life. I've still an employment tribunal to fight, but Rics spirit lives on in me, and I will do it.
I have had really bad days, and still do, but not as many, but for those of you that are in the long dark tunnel, I guess I'm trying to shine some light.
Hugs to you all, and I wouldn't have got to where I am today, without you lovely understanding people x
I think I am about the same place as you. I realized the same thing a few weeks ago, Arnie would not want me to just exist, he would want me to LIVE !!! I am trying everyday to make it better.
I still have bad days as well but find I can often change my thinking to something more positive and if I can not then I let it out, then pick myself back up and continue on.
Not sure what all this means yet and what direction I am going to take but I do see some light as well.
I never thought I would make it to the place that I am today during those first 6 months but I am glad that I was wrong about that. I didn't like that place at all...........hugs
What can i say? this post was WONDERFUL!
You and Thom WILL live out that legacy for Ric! and a PROUD one it will be!
Keep that spring in your step and also you SPIRIT!!
Getting to that life that is out there, and LIVING IT!
WOO HOO for you, and HUGS diane
I think we need to adjust (we don't "move on" or "get over it") to our new lives, our spouses will always be a part of our lives. I can't think of a single spouse who has gone before us that would want to see us continue in deep pain and sorrow and sadness for the rest of our lives. Yes, it's hard to figure out our path and yes, the sadness and missing them and our love goes to the core of our beings, but the best we can do for their honor is to find a way to live the best life we can. Thanks for the encouraging post---big hugs, Sal