Nicker07.. please read my journel (good & bad)

This is one of those if I had known then what I know now.

I would have checked out the location around my house that I purchased. While the house is perfect the perks, shopping, places to eat, places to go are lacking. I am learning to work around that.

I would have learned sooner, when people ask you how you are they really do not want to know. Most people are very kind and will pretend listen.

People want to give you advice on how to grief. Most of these people are married or have never been married. Interesting what can they know? I have learned to say thank you but no thank you as kindly as I possibly can.

As far as anything good, I have not found any good. I knew I was strong and still continue to be strong. It was a great comfort to have someone at your back.

About being strong, I fake a lot of this if you were to really push me I would dissolve in to a big puddle. I fake it until I make it.

I know my husband is gone and not coming back, I know my old life is gone and not coming back.

I am creating a new life for myself, not very exciting, but it will do.

I am at 27 months. I was forced to move into a smaller apartment due to financial reasons, during the first year. It was devasting in some ways, downsizing, sorting through stuff, leaving the memories,etc. However, it prepared me for my recent move into a "seniors" building and that has been good for me. Also changing my church memebership has been a good move. On the other side, I turned to food for comfort during this time, and since I have always had to battle my weight, this was not such a good idea. I now have to worry about losing 30 lbs. It will never be the same, and I will always miss him, but overall, I think things have worked out the best way they could. laurabp

Hi ~ My husband has been gone for 10 years. For the life of me I cannot think of anything good.

the bad is:

Loneliness

More loneliness

Found out how incredibly strong I HAD to become

Found out that "friends" dump you after the husband dies.

Financial insecurity

This new single life isn't all it's cracked up to be and I don't want any part of it.

I'm just biding my time until I'm called "home."

I have found a new me, which was actually the old me. I forgot who she was. Miss my life and my husband, but enjoying life when I can. I am more outgoing, not always relying on my husband to find us friends and things to do. I am independent again. I have made friends I never would have. There are good things. You just have to look for them.