Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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Truhal 08/19/2010

One year after my mother died, I remember thinking how so much had changed. She wouldn't have recognized this planet if she came back.

Today, I was thinking of the changes since March 15, 2009. This is the last day my husband was conscious. Here's my small list:

1) IPAD hadn't come out.
2) The Volcano hadn't erupted
3) Kindle 3 hadn't been invented
4) We hadn't had bad storms all over the place
5) Economist were starting to belive the recession was over.
6) Stock were up.
7) The Arizona laws
8) A ton of new music and movies
9) 3D televisions available at Best Buy
10) etc

All this brings home to me how the world keeps on going. No matter how I want to stop and just greive, things continue to move forward. Sort of reminds me of doubledutch, the ropes continues to turn and you have to time it and jump in. I guess that's what I've got to do for the rest of my life.

Truhal 08/19/2010

I meant to say March 15, 2010.

deleted_user 08/19/2010

You are so right...even since my husband passed in Nov. there have been many events...and when something happens I just want to talk to him about it....there have been so many weather records set in New England this year he just wouldn't believe it....the meteor shower last week...I can't remember the last time it rained...and the biggest event in Ma was Scott Brown winning the senate race to replace Kennedy's seat....never in a million years did I think that would happen..wonder if Buddy had something to do with that:) You are right change goes on all around us...and we seem to stand still..

ricebells 08/19/2010

l know we get trapped in our mind with all the grieving,we forget that there is still a world out there,still going on around us,sometimes we feel as lf we are not part of this world,but we are,we just lost track of time in a way.l suppose its like that film,"stop the world,l want to get off"but the world doesan,t stop,lt justs keeps going on around us,lts just that for a while we haven,t noticed lt.

Alice

Karen-Dugan 08/19/2010

Paul was a hugh Cincinnati Bengals football fan, and they usually don't do too well during the season. But he still enjoyed them anyways. During last season, they started doing really well and I believe even made it to the playoffs.
It makes me smile to think that after Paul passed the first part of December. His favorite team seemed to play very well. And I wished he could have been here to experience it.
His youngest son, is also a hugh fan of the same team, I feel as though Brian is carrying on the tradition.

Thank you for sharing

deleted_user 08/19/2010

So many things that I wanted to talk to Rob about since Jan. 13th. Even as he lay dying he was unaware of the record snow and state of emergency in NJ. He should know his Mom is now in the nursing home with his Dad. I so wanted to fret with him over the gulf oil spill. I could go on and on. It is just down right sad and hard on us not being able to share things. Hug. Donna

deleted_user 08/19/2010

I would have loved to share with him our daughters first day of high school today. It just seemed so odd this morning him not being here. The first day of school was usually a huge thing around our house.

deleted_user 08/19/2010

I too often think of all the changes and events in the last 2 1/2 yrs. that DH did not get to see. Mainly seeing our granddaughter getting older and the new granddaughter he never knew. He would have been thrilled with another little girl. Going to the older ones ball games - she was too small to play when he was here. We live in Louisiana and the Saints won the Super Bowl, enough said. We live in a small town and there have been many changes in the area including new stores, etc. We have had 2 more hurricanes after Katrina. Many other things. Like others said, the world does keep on going and it seems I'm standing still in a lot of ways because I can't share things with him. Take care, Sandra

deleted_user 08/19/2010

Oh yeah! The Saints. Talk about changes! :)

deleted_user 08/20/2010

I have had the same thoughts. I add to the list, however, the political issues in some of the south american countries that my husband so much liked to follow. But here's what really is kind of wierd, my husband was watching a soap opera in venezuelan tv (these usually only last a few months unlike our soaps that go from generation to generation), and guess what the title was? Nada es eterno en el mundo! Nothing is eternal in the world! Well, he wasn't able to finish it and I certainly couldn't do it alone -- it would have been too difficult.
I guess we will be watching changes until it's our turn and then our children might have the same thoughts.

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