Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
I'm coming to you all for guidance again. I have too much time on my hands and too little motivation to do anything about it.
Back story, we both were retired and planned to "snowbird" winters and to travel north in the heat of summers. We made an easy transition to that lifestyle and we're like college kids. No responsibility but for each other. Then serious health issues struck us both. Between April to April one of the two of us were either hospitalized or in a nursing home except for 32 days. I recovered from 3 serious back surgeries and bone infection and my Big Swede recovered and came home from the nursing home for 2 1/2 months.
All the medical expenses plus nursing home care wiped out our saving. Three weeks after I lost the love of my life I enrolled in a nursing program to obtain my certification. (Didn't think that thru to well. Widows brain made the 6 weeks of classes and testing a nightmare.) I planned on working as a home health aid. I need the extra income and could not return to the stress of my former work.
When i was called to provide care for a client I turned tge job down. I knew I would spend the entire working day in tears. So now I plan to take another class to certify to handle and pass medications. But. . . . I don't know if I can handle providing the same care to others that I gave my wonderful Big Swede. I know my sense of responsibility would force me out of my home and to the job, but don't know if it's wise to try this. I would be about 6 1/2 - 7 months out. Any thoughts? Thank you for "listening".
{{{ Hugs}}} ~ Bailey ~
Back story, we both were retired and planned to "snowbird" winters and to travel north in the heat of summers. We made an easy transition to that lifestyle and we're like college kids. No responsibility but for each other. Then serious health issues struck us both. Between April to April one of the two of us were either hospitalized or in a nursing home except for 32 days. I recovered from 3 serious back surgeries and bone infection and my Big Swede recovered and came home from the nursing home for 2 1/2 months.
All the medical expenses plus nursing home care wiped out our saving. Three weeks after I lost the love of my life I enrolled in a nursing program to obtain my certification. (Didn't think that thru to well. Widows brain made the 6 weeks of classes and testing a nightmare.) I planned on working as a home health aid. I need the extra income and could not return to the stress of my former work.
When i was called to provide care for a client I turned tge job down. I knew I would spend the entire working day in tears. So now I plan to take another class to certify to handle and pass medications. But. . . . I don't know if I can handle providing the same care to others that I gave my wonderful Big Swede. I know my sense of responsibility would force me out of my home and to the job, but don't know if it's wise to try this. I would be about 6 1/2 - 7 months out. Any thoughts? Thank you for "listening".
{{{ Hugs}}} ~ Bailey ~
I work in the non-profit world. We raise money to help the homeless, children and elderly all over the globe. It sure feels good to do this kind of work.
If I were to stay home, I'd be so inside myself, I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to get out!
I don't think I'd be able to do hands-on care for fear that it would drag me to a very dark place of sadness and bad memories. I'm sure there are some that are capable of doing this kind of work and I give them a lot of credit.
I prefer collecting the money and sending it to the folks who are better at hands-on care!
Whatever we do, it's so good to just get outside ourselves!!!!
Roz