Your post brings back thoughts of where I was not so long ago. I was so desperate to avoid spending a weekend alone that I would frantically make plans for several weeks out. Work kept me busy during the week and as you wrote, there were times I would have to hide the tears. Now at 15 months out, I've been feeling differently. I spent the past two weekends alone and am sorry I only have part of this weekend alone. I needed to give myself some time alone and allow enough time to pass until I could be alone and not necessarily feel lonely. Well, ok part of the weekend I do feel a bit lonely, but I am learning to work through it, allow the tears and then do something I enjoy or that distracts me completely. Things will improve, hopefully for you as well. I miss my husband every day but the burden is getting easier to carry. Hope you are able to find some peace, even in the loneliness. God Bless

Hugs. I know what you mean. The weekends are rough. Any sort of empty time is rough. Maybe make a list of things to fill the moments, just a list to turn to when you feel lost.

Weekends are tough. I hold onto comments that burdens will get easier to carry cos it is damn hard at the moment. I went out for five hours or so today with a friend but came home feeling just as alone. Oh well, Saturday is almost over.....xx

Isn't it horrible that we wish our lives away..I am waiting for another 2 years to pass so i can feel something that does not hurt..the tingling in my knees that go to my feet is not as often..Ha.. i just got one..these tingling feelings..its anxiety. Breathe..and think about something you said or did that may be funny..i myself have been known to be insane..i never had fear then so i will remember something i said or did that was a question like Why did i do that again ?? Before long i am crippled over with laughter..I started well am ,still reading about atoms and how they are recycled.. into the land of science Quantum I go...I truly want to believe this is all an illusion and I am going to Wake up.Also i have been here before after the death of my Mother and her suffering We will survive :)

Did you have activities you participated in before? Yoga, book club, church, museum, volunteer??
I walk the mall since it is cold. It's helpful to get involved, then we can search for others in our situation.
Try to find something positive everyday
jdp

I am with you weekends and evening are the hardest. I try to stay distracted. Keeping my mind off of the thing that is constantly in the back of your mind. I sometimes want to go next door and ask my neighbor how to get used to being alone? There are tons of people who are single by choice or divorced and they seem to get through it. Is it an art? I have no idea I just know that I am not a fan of it and I don't want to be a widow and I don't want to be alone. But here we are.... You are not alone :-) Jeanne ( praying for us )