Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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Death & Dying
/ Widows & Widowers Support Group

Anniversery of death

LousMarie
LousMarie
It has been 2 years since my precious Lou passed away. Presidents day weekend isn't my favorite time of year. He was my best friend. He was my 2nd husband and God let me have him for 7 wonderful years. My daughters miss him too. Then last Monday (the 9th) more sadness happened. My 1st husband and father of my children passed away. I feel miserable. I didn't realize how much his dying would hurt me. We had babies together and I didn't stop lovin him when he left me. It is very hard to experience grief and try to be strong for my girls at the same time. It is worse for them, their dad died. I can't stop crying.
How do I help them while holding myself together?
sandeestttn
sandeestttn
I am so sorry. Feb 11, 2013 I lost my husband of 47 years. Burial was Valentines Day. I know how you are feeling today. Just do your best. I pray for your Peace. Sandee
diannalrdm
diannalrdm
I understand completely. Last Wed was my Dad's birthday. I lost him Nov of 2013. Friday was my husband's birthday. I lost him Jan of 2013. Saturday was the 27th anniversary of my Mom's death. Last week sucked.
Community LeaderShrn
Shrn
You let your children see your pain and sadness which gives them the permission to feel their own emotions. You help them to understand that you will make it through this together. You believe and assure them that they will always have there dad (both ) in their hearts and love doesn't die only bodies. If you have concerns you can also contact hospice or church related groups who specialize in grieving.

I'm very sorry for your loss. I understand the pain and losing two people so close makes it hard. I hope being here brings you strength. Sharon
deleted_user
deleted_user
Marie, I'm sorry for your many loses. It seems the sadness will prevail. Maybe for now, maybe for tomorrow but it won't consume us.

As you've proven in the past, we must move forward and live our lives to show our children that how we handle death shows who we truly are in life.

I wish you calmer more peaceful and loving days ahead.

Roz
Lisastp
Lisastp
What you are going through is very sad -- the sadness of divorce from a long time ago, combined with the loss of your husband, and now the sadness of the death of your first husband. That's a lot of loss, all of it affecting you and your children deeply. It sounds like the term "complicated grief" could apply to this now, in my opinion. Grief counseling is helping me with my loss right now, and I'm learning a lot about my strength and my weak points (and blind spots). Maybe it could help you too at this point?