As a medical professional myself, things like that mean a lot. You don't need to meet the doctors in person if it would make you feel funny, Send them a card or a letter expressing your feelings.

hawg - I think they would appreciate your thoughts - in person or by mail. I don't have a good feeling about my husband's main oncologist. But his partner, the nurses, the hospice nurses - all were truly wonderful. I put an ad in the paper, thanking them, and I do so when they come into my deli. I understand your feeling to thank them. They're human beings as well; I think it's wonderful that you want to reach out and tell them. Go for it! Hugs, Marsha

I would say your reaction is normal. After my husband died I sent a cards with a personal note of thanks to both the hospital special care unit, and the assisted living facility where he spent several years, and also thanked them in the obituary write-up. laurabp

I think it would be very nice and well appreciated for you to send a card or stop in with a box of candy for the one that's close to where you live. Sharon

You can always write a letter to them. When my husband passed I had it in mind to write a letter to his oncologist and brain surgeon. I never did because of the procrastination. I know that they tried to help my husband and them along with my husband's strength prolonged his life from 6 months to 11. So, if you feel to uncomfortable or weird talking to them in person send them a letter.

I agree with RiverBends. Doctors like any other customer service persons don't usually get thanked for trying there best to help some one.

I haven't said anything to my husband's doctor's yet because I still have mixed feelings. One of them even told my husband that it wasn't them that got him out of the coma it was me. I wouldn't give up on him.

I argued with nurses who acted like he wasn't worth their bother. I told off CNA's who didn't wash him properly after he was dirty. I even told the doctors to confer with other doctors because his PTSD meds were not playing nice with the meds they were giving him.

After he woke up I had another month and a half with him and I don't regret anything I did to help him be with me as long as he could. He was in there, I knew it because the machine stats reacted as soon as I walked into the room and he would try and kiss me even while in the coma.

I did speak with my husband's oncologist. I wanted him to know that his expertise was appreciated, and more than that, the "human" way he treated me and my husband from the minute we met him, made such a huge difference to us. And this is a man that deals with death on a daily basis. I think you should tell them, on the phone, in person, by mail, email, whatever. I think it would also keep you in touch with the bit of gratitude that you do have, even at such a terrible time.

I thanked the GP, paramedics and nurses who all visited Rod at home throughout his illness, in the obituary notice. Then at Christmas, which was exactly 6 months after Rod passed, I sent cards thanking them again for their help during the past year. I also called at the ambulance station with a box of shortbread and spoke personally to one of the paramedics there. These are all very special people and they deserved to be thanked for their kindness.

I also went back to the clinic and talked to some of my husband's doctors a few days after he died. There was one doctor who I specially wanted to thank for his support and the time he dedicated to my husband whenever we went to see him. I felt the deepest admiration for this oncologist, thinking that he had to deal with this kind of situation day in and day out, hour after hour, yet he was always so kind, patient and understanding. I needed to tell him that, and he seemed happy to hear it. It gave me a sense of closure too.

Hawg, you are not crazy at all. I think it is a great idea. The doctors and staff would really appreciate it. I sent the oncologist staff a copy of the memeorial service and a thank you note and memtioned the nurse's name because Robert would mention her.

I am in awe of you for having the strength and heart to do this. By all means, give them the thanks and gratitude they deserve.

I feel like such a weakling, for I don't ever want to see the cancer center or Samaritan ward we faced again.

I had run into one of his chemo nurses the day I was at the florist ordering my husband's funeral flowers. I did thank her and give her a hug. She and the staff were very good to him.

For me, I also felt an urge to go back to the hospital and just walk the halls. I had been there sometimes 3 days a week for 2 years. The hospital had a special group greiving ceremony in the chapel, which I attended. It was a big help as I was able to say hello to many of the nurses. I also procrastinated over sending a letter or card to my oncologist (wife died of pancreatic cancer). So I never did.

I have decided to write both Drs. a personal note of thanks. They were a big part of our lives for 7 years, and my husband trusted them with his life, which in my opinion they did their best to let him live the way he wanted. (When diagnosed in 2002 they gave him only 3-6 months)

Go for it...trust your heart and feelings on this topic. There is a couple that mailed me a basket of fresh pastries after the girls died. It was the first food I allowed myself to eat. I still thank them from time to time for those pastries and muffins. they probably think i am silly, but the meaning was immense to me. No matter what their reaction, it sounds like a great idea to me. I wish you much love and peace.

Scott

Yes I felt the same way. My husbands doctor sent me a lovely letter after my husband.