Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
I was one of those happily single women. My DH and I had divorced and I was glad to be single again. I liked the independence, the freedom of not having someone to consider when making decisions. It took four years for my husband to get me to marry him again and by then I was a different woman. Now it's 8 years later and I'm alone again. It hard going back to way life was before. I don't know how to do it. I don't enjoy being single. I want my old life back. I know it's not possible.
When I was a child, I remember a close member of my family telling me to never give my heart completly. You'll end up hurt, she said. She went on to explain that it was okay to fall in love, but not deeply. Hold something of yourself back. Strange advice, some will say, but believed it and made sure I never gave my heart completly. Then I met my husband. Look at me now. True, I had almost eight years of marital bliss, but I'm hurting more than I've ever in my life. At night, when I'm lying in bed, feeling horrible, and relying on God to get me through, I can't help but think of that advice and how my life could be now if I'd listened.
My husband and I had been together for a total of eighteen years. We were best friends. The first time we married, I listened to the advice and loved my husband, but I held back. When we divorced, I was fine, glad to be single again. Life was good and we were still close friends. We used to get together and hang out and do stuff together. It was strictly platonic and I even dated a little.
Then I became born again and we remarried. I decided that the advice I'd been given was bad. This time, I decided to give my heart completely. I got less than eight years with my husband. Now, at 53, I could have years ahead of me and I could spend all of it suffering, missing him, wanting him back. If I'd only held back. I still could have enjoyed my life with him. He still could have cherished me. but losing him would have been easier.
I know I'm having a down moment, and that tomorrow I'll be back to normal(new normal), but I'm tired of the ups and downs. I don't know that I would do this if I ever married again.
When I was a child, I remember a close member of my family telling me to never give my heart completly. You'll end up hurt, she said. She went on to explain that it was okay to fall in love, but not deeply. Hold something of yourself back. Strange advice, some will say, but believed it and made sure I never gave my heart completly. Then I met my husband. Look at me now. True, I had almost eight years of marital bliss, but I'm hurting more than I've ever in my life. At night, when I'm lying in bed, feeling horrible, and relying on God to get me through, I can't help but think of that advice and how my life could be now if I'd listened.
My husband and I had been together for a total of eighteen years. We were best friends. The first time we married, I listened to the advice and loved my husband, but I held back. When we divorced, I was fine, glad to be single again. Life was good and we were still close friends. We used to get together and hang out and do stuff together. It was strictly platonic and I even dated a little.
Then I became born again and we remarried. I decided that the advice I'd been given was bad. This time, I decided to give my heart completely. I got less than eight years with my husband. Now, at 53, I could have years ahead of me and I could spend all of it suffering, missing him, wanting him back. If I'd only held back. I still could have enjoyed my life with him. He still could have cherished me. but losing him would have been easier.
I know I'm having a down moment, and that tomorrow I'll be back to normal(new normal), but I'm tired of the ups and downs. I don't know that I would do this if I ever married again.
-
My 6mo twin DD's are EBF and just started rice cereal on the first. Everything has been going fine except this morning one of them had a diaper rash (lots of redness around her anus). I read this as one of the signs of an allergy. BUT I did just buy a different brand diaper yesterday (which they have used randomly before w/no issues). Do you think its the cereal or the diaper? Im ready to start...
Lorita