Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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Death & Dying
/ Widows & Widowers Support Group

A Friend said

nvcowboy2
nvcowboy2

The shock to my core was real the morning my wife was called to heaven.


I was blessed to have been here at home with her, to hold her when she passed sudenly.


A friend said to me 6 weeks later "It's time for you to move on with your life". 


It took another friend to say "don't do it, you have too much to live for" .


It seemed to me that no one can truly know how much damage can be done with just a few words.


The words spoken to me last Saturday could have easily been the trigger that would have sent me over the edge to suicide.


I cried so hard for hours feeling alone and misunderstood. My whole body felt as though I was hit by a train.


But then.....


A friend said " here's my number, call me or text me".


I can't stress enough , the importance of having the right kinds of friends during a time like this.


In my case, my friend and I have both lost a spouse and can relate on so many levels.


My NEW FRIEND would never tell me it's time to move on with your life.


Message to OLD FRIEND: I'm movivng on....

Kimberlina
Kimberlina
Sorry some one said that to you. Unless people have gone through what we are going through they honestly have no clue. A couple of shock factors said to me were " I know how you feel my dog died" and " It is kinda of like a divorce"
So please let the in-sensitiveness of people do no harm. Hugs to you -Kim
regwin
regwin
I'm so sorry for your loss. People who have not had a loss, could never understand until they go through the same experience. Wishing you strength and peace. Hugs, Dolores
roxanne809
roxanne809
One of the worst things about our loss is that we feel so isolated by not being understood and the stupid things said by those who have not lived this experience. I am so glad that you have found someone who does understand. Please know that your posting will help others here trying to make some sense of their life without their loved one by their side. I ditto Dolores on wishing you strength and peace. Roxanne
cherriesjublie
cherriesjublie
So very sorry it is 2 months for me and I can not even cope
travelgal55
travelgal55
Someone actually asked me if it was a blessing that my husband died!
cupolatte
cupolatte
You are so right about friends. I know that God used my friends to get me through those first awful years without my husband. I am glad that you have a good friend. Those other people mean well, but they don't have a clue. Try to let those kinds of comments roll off of your back.

Those thoughts about suicide are not unusual. I had them too. I know of many people who have. You know, it feels as if we are not coping and we are not really living, but time does pass and things do get easier. It takes time though. For now you have to go through this one day at a time. I am glad your friend is there for you. Praying for you!
summe
summe
Hello
I am so sorry for your loss.
I lost my husband a few months ago
One thing to know it will get better
I’ve become a very realistic and strong person through it all

Remember the good times and stay strong
Take care
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