Hey Jon,
It's been seven months for me. My wife went home in August last summer. I look at it as not so much moving on as just moving. As I have been told first by my uncle and several other folks, this isn't something you can get over but you have to eventually learn to live with. It is the worst pain I have ever felt.
I hear what your saying though. Your future has obliterated without her to share it with. My wife was my future and now each day I try to figure out where to now. It does get better but right now at two months just take it a day at a time. May even break it down to an hour at a time.
What has helped me along with my faith, is remembering my wife's personality and knowing what she would want for me. To try and find some happiness and live the rest of my life. Main thing right now just do what you need for you. Take care of yourself and don't rush yourself. Keep thinking about what she would want for you. This is a great site for support. The folks here are extremely compassionate and caring. The most helpful is that everyone here has been at the point you are at right now. My prayers are with you.
Peace, Tim

Thank You Tim,

Its nice to be able to talk about this with someone like me...even my parents have said they cannot even understand what I;m feeling...sure, everyone has lost someone, however, until they loose their Spouse, they cannot understand the void you feel. Thank you again, I do keep her memory with me every day...I have been wearing her ring around my neck since she passed in Feb. and try to take it one day at a time.

Jon.

Believe me, you cannot know or understand the grief of losing a loved one...until you lose one. Intellectually, people may think the know what it's like, but until it happens to you, you cannot know. That said, there's also nothing you can do to fix grief. It is what it is, and you just have to go through it. Sorry. I'm a guy, so I'm not going to sugar coat it.

I describe losing a loved one like having a huge chunk ripped out of you. Emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and even physically it can affect you. The loss of companionship, physical intimacy, and your spiritual ally is tough to deal with. It's like being disabled. You're wounded, so you have to learn to overcome the wound and carry on.

If you break your leg, you may always have a limp, and it may never be quite the same as it was before. However, it will heal in time, and you'll need to press forward regardless. That's what you have to do with grief. It's not moving on so much as moving forward with the rest of your life.

You will always love and miss the departed one. There is no getting over that! But you don't honor them by giving up and wasting the precious gift of life while you still have it. Your wife wouldn't want that!

I lost my wife of 37 years, and she was my best friend, too (pretty much my only friend). I wish so much I could still have her, and I regret not doing more with her when she was here. Regardless, wishing doesn't change reality. I have moments where I feel like giving up, but I simply can't and won't.

I'm sorry for the loss of your wonderful Maria. Two months after such a heartache the only thing you can do is grieve. Feeling the loss and getting through the time of raging emotions is important. Keep focused on the present, instead of anticipating the future. Looking back at the love you shared and release the tears. Yes, it's okay to cry. It is unavoidable.
Being here brought me understanding when my husband passed from lung cancer. I felt understood in a world that seemed to move without me. I welcome you to the group and hope you find comfort here with us. Sharon

It is good to read comments from men. I lost my best friend 16 months ago and miss him every minute of every day. Al and I had been married 37 years.

I am the first widow in every group of friends we had, first in my extended family, first in my high school class of 1966. It is so hard to see/hear of other retirees traveling, enjoying retirement and just spending time together, time you didn't always have enough of when both were working.

But our minister gave a sermon a couple weeks ago where he said our loved ones are in heaven and so happy that they aren't thinking about us every minute or care about any material things they loved here on earth. I do believe our loved ones are watching over us but now I feel better about selling his tools and as I called them, "boy toys".

The saying "until you have walked a mile in my shoes" is so true. Friends are caring, mean well, but don't really understand the pain of losing a spouse. I hope they don't have to experience it for a long time.

Hi Jon, so sorry for your the loss of your beloved wife. It's been 13 months since I lost my wife of 20 years. She was just 48 and the love of my life and the center of my world. I am moving on as well as possible and certainly in a better state than I was a year ago. I have always told people I will never get over this but I'll get through it, if that makes sense.
I just got laid off of my job of 15 years last Thursday and although a bit of a setback I'm of the opinion that the worst thing that could possibly ever happen to me in my life already has so I will get through this ok as well.
I won't sugar coat it the early days and months are agonizing torture but as you will hear it does get better with time if you allow yourself to go through the grieving process but it is hard work. Cry and scream, be angry, sad whatever it takes. I can't put into words how this group has helped me survive and my heart breaks when a new member appears but we all know what you are going through right now so if you need to talk or listen please do. Take care ~Pete

My heartfelt thanks to all of you reaching out to me...I don't even know any of you..but you have made me feel welcome.

Dear Jon, there is no moving on, you push forward however you can to allow yourself time to grieve. You will never be over her. I have come to realize I will always be sad about my husband passing away, but as time has gone on, I tend to concentrate more on the happy moments, which were alot. You will also get there. Might be a good idea to join a grief support group. I attended 3 griefshare groups, they were 13 weeks long, helped me unbelievably. I can only imagine your pain, feel free to vent, talk, rant whatever you need to help you process and accept your bestfriend is not here physically, but she is there with you spiritually. Much love and hugs carla

Someone told me this won't get better....but it will change. Be different. I choose not to move on. But to keep going. He will be with me forever.

Your Maria will always be with you. She owns a piece of your heart

Im not even a month yet

Welcome to the club nobody wants to belong to. I lost my Tim 8/21/2013, 8 days after our 36th wedding anniversary. He was my best and really only friend. I took it one minute, one hour, one day at a time. It is the hardest thing you will ever experience.
Time does not heal but time allows us to adjust and you will adjust. You came to the right place.
Take care of yourself and stay strong.
Hugs, Sandi

Shelda, I'm so sorry. You know what I'm feeling as well...next week will be 2 months for me, one month Is rough. I have come to accept in my case, She is at peace...not pain.