Kim: You are doing a good job! We carry the best of our spouses with us as we brave this future we never expected. You are right, people start out not wanting us to talk about our lost loves. I think because it scares them and they don't want to see us unhappy. I kept talking anyway, and now people don't seem to mind as much.

Hugs,
Val

Hi Kim,
At 15 months, I talk about Ben any chance I get. When I went to see my family in England, they thought they were protecting me by not talking about Ben. When I said it's ok, I need to hear about their memories too, we all were free to laugh and cry together.
Like you Kim, I keep Ben very much alive in my heart. He too was an amazing, loyal, compassionate man.
Sending you much love and hugs,
Sandra

Kim, I agree with Val. I talk about Amy whether they want to hear it or not, even to strangers. They need to know she existed and I find as long as I want to share they will listen unless I get too weepy and then it gets a little uncomfortable. You talk about him all you want even if it's just to yourself. We are here to listen as well. Peace to you ~Pete

Hi Kim, it will be 5 months for me Wednesday. We seem to be traveling in the same timeline. I talk about my husband often too. How could we not? He too was my life for so many years and I wouldn't be me if not for him. Yes it may make people uncomfortable, tough! How uncomfortable are we? You are doing fantastic! Hang in there, hugs and love, Michele

Oh Kim. I'm so sorry. I understand your pain. That's the special part of this group. We've been there. In many ways we Are there. The only difference is some have been there longer and others are just beginning. Know you're welcome to talk about Don here forever. He will always live in your heart and in your life as part of all you are. Gentle hug, my friend, I wish I could comfort you in person. Sharon

Kim
I am so sorry people wont let you talk about Don. He was part of you and part of your life. People need to understand that.
32 years of my life were spent with Al so how can I not talk about him? He was part of my everyday and everything I have done. Share your stories. Sometimes sharing these moments will bring tears but sometimes they will bring smiles. He is part of your past and still in your heart. If no one else will listen we are here to to do just that and share our memories as well.
Love and Hugs,
Kathy

Hi Kim, I'm not far behind you either on this new road nobody wants to be on. Something you mentioned about how you and Don were such different people. Same with Juanita and I. When we met so many years ago, she knew love, everything about her was love, and in fact, her family was so loving toward me that it literally freaked me out our first couple of years together. You see, I came from a very unloving home - didn't know anything about love or how to live that way. Well, they say opposites attract, and for us, that held true. All I know is that Juanita and I completed each other - we each had strengths the other one lacked. Together, we were great. And I am so fortunate to have had that experience with her. Bottom line is, at least now I know how good it can be and like you, I cherish that memory of "us". God bless you ~ Scott

I talk about my husband all the time it has been two months today. It is very normal and you should be able to do that. I talk to my husband all the time and feel like he is still here watching out for me. It is very hard being alone now for me but I am adjusting and my husband would want me to be strong and did tell me that before he died. I miss him a lot and have my days I cry when I get in from work that is when I realize it is true and he is gone. We will make it I pray a whole lot more than I used to and depend on GOD's help to make each day, just take one day at a time as they say don't think about tomorrow. I am trying to do that and it is easier. GOD bless you and write me any time you want to talk.

I was at 6 months yesterday and like you there are so many traits of Ron's thar I am trying to emulate. He was such a great guy. I do miss him so much, but he will always be part of me

I am at 32 months today and from the get go I talk about him. I did notice when it was more welcome and would curb it somewhat with some people but I never stopped myself from talking about him and still do. I also still talk to him . You do what is right for you so that you can heal. Others will come around. xoxo

Hello Kim, pain getting dissolved is the pain shared. Yes, keep talking...keep sharing....hugs, tiger